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Jana Danielson is an award-winning wellness entrepreneur who through her own experience with physical pain turned her mess into her message which has now become her mission. She is an Amazon Best Selling Author, owner of Lead Pilates and Lead Integrated Health Therapies, her bricks & mortar businesses and the... Read More
Marci Shimoff (Shy-Moff) is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, a world-renowned transformational teacher, and an expert on happiness, success, and unconditional love. Marci’s books include the runaway bestsellers, Happy for No Reason, Love for No Reason, and six titles in the phenomenally successful Chicken Soup for the Woman’s... Read More
- Do you want to be happy for no reason?
- All you need to do is live in the Miracle Zone
- Gain insights into the 7 Areas of Happiness that pave your way to the Miracle Zone specifically, Marci will show you how the Love Response (which is the scientific opposite of the Stress Response) can impact our health and wellness in a positive way
Jana Danielson
Hey everybody. Thanks for making your way back to the virtual medicine of mindset stage. I’m Jana Danielson, I am your host and I have a really um important special sparkly guest coming onto our virtual stage, Marci Shimoff and I know that name is going to be familiar to you now, let me tell you a little bit about Marci, she is the number one New York times best selling author. She’s a world renowned transformational teacher and expert on happiness, success and unconditional love and we’re gonna get to pick her brain a little bit today about those aspects of health and wellness and life. Her books include the runaway bestsellers. Happy for no reason, Love for no reason six titles in the chicken soup for the Women’s Soul series and I’ll never forget being in Costco and seeing this series and I was like what is this? So the fact that I get some time with her today is a little bit of a fan girl have to.
I’m gonna be honest, her books have sold more than 16 million copies worldwide in 33 languages and it really have talked all of the major bestseller lists and this is really cool. When I read this, she’s been on the New York times best seller list for a total of 121 weeks like that is phenomenal. Marci is one of the best selling female nonfiction authors of all time. So she knows her stuff. Ladies and gentlemen and we get to learn from her today. She is the host of the national PBS television special. Happy for no reason. She’s a featured teacher in the Secret and the narrator for the award winning film Happy. She co leads a worldwide program called Your year of miracles, which many of you might be familiar with and with thousands of participants from 72 countries that have been touched by the brilliance of this amazing woman. And so she really has inspired millions of people from around the world and is dedicated her whole entire life to helping people live more miraculous, empowered and joy filled lives. And I feel like we just need more of that. So Marci thank you so much for saying yes to this summit and being with us today.
Marci Shimoff
Oh I’m delighted. I love what you’re doing with this summit and I’m so happy to get to be here and share some hopefully very useful things for everybody.
Jana Danielson
Amazing. Amazing. Okay, so let’s ground this conversation in the just the concept of a life filled with miracles. Tell us a little bit about your story and how this idea of feeling like we deserve a life of miracles came to be.
Marci Shimoff
Yeah, so I have to start at the beginning and the beginning is I was born depressed. I came out of the womb with what I call existential angst. Yeah, I had a great family, great parents, wonderful circumstances, but I just had this dark cloud around me and I actually and later in life believed that it was some ancestral depression and trauma perhaps. But I went through my childhood, depressed. My solution to depression in those days was something called sugar. I became a sugar addict at a young age. By the time I was in high school I was about 40 lb overweight. Did not contribute to my being any happier, that’s for sure. And so when I was In my early 20’s I wanted to be happy. You know I wanted what everybody wants to be happy and I did what I thought people do to be happy. I set goals for myself and I figured once I hit those five goals I’ll be happy, right and I’m gonna share those five goals with you because I think people can relate to these number one. I wanted a successful career helping people too. I wanted a great husband and life partner, I wanted wonderful friends, I wanted a comfortable home and the fifth one was I wanted the equivalent of Halle Berry’s body.
Now I got four out of the five, I do not have Halle Berry’s body but I have a healthy body for which I’m very, very grateful. So I worked really hard to get all my ducks in a row to make sure I had all these things and I had a turning point moment. It was in 1998 I had three books in the top five on the New York times bestseller list all at the same time, I just finished giving the speech to 8000 people. I had autographed 5432 books they were counting and my client had hired a massage therapist to massage my hand every few minutes, so I didn’t know I could keep on signing on one hand. I felt like an author, rock star. But after I signed the last book, I went up to my hotel room, I walked over to the windows, it was in Chicago with huge windows overlooking like Michigan. And I walked over and I took in that beautiful view on top of the world. And I turned around and I collapsed onto the bed in tears and I collapsed in tears because I realized I had worked so hard for all of that. And I still have that same emptiness in my heart that I had as a little kid. It didn’t help.
And I realized this was the end of the road. I could no longer fool myself into thinking that just that next thing, then I’d be happy. And so I actually dove headfirst into the study of happiness and I interviewed over 100 at the time have now interviewed over 1000 what I call unconditionally happy people. People are happy for no reason, you know, different circumstances, but just happy no matter what. And I interviewed the researchers and I started doing what they were doing and it worked. I would say I went from a D plus and Happiness if you were grading me to an I’m a solid a now, that doesn’t mean I’m I’m still a work in progress, it’s always ongoing, but it’s, it works. And so I’ve taught this to thousands of people and then about 10 years ago I started waking up every morning and going, wow, my life is just miraculous. Like it is like the right people, which I had no idea what the day would hold, but the most cool people would show up or you know, things would happen that were just like, you know, when you’re in the flow and I thought, man, I know I know how to live a miraculous life, I think I know how to live a miraculous life. Let me test this out and I started testing that out with teaching that to people and it works as well. So anyway, that’s my nutshell of a story. And the good news is I know that no matter where somebody is in terms of their happiness or where, where they’re in in their life, they could be completely, you know, like, oh my God, I’m tearing their hair out, I need a miracle, it is absolutely possible for everybody to shift their life and it’s nowhere near as hard as people think.
Jana Danielson
Okay, so now that we’ve set the stage with that and people are like, oh, we want more. Tell us about this concept. You have called the miracle zone, what is it? How do we get there? Let’s let’s go in that direction.
Marci Shimoff
Perfect. I need to speak, I think a little bit about happiness first, so that it can make sense what I’m talking about in the miracle zone. If that’s okay, absolutely, that works okay, so I’m gonna pick up the miracle zone in a few minutes. But what I found is that people have the reason that some people are super happy and other people aren’t really doesn’t have to do with their circumstances. It has to do with something called their happiness set point. We all have a happiness set point. And no matter what happens to us, whether it’s good or bad, we will tend to hover around our happiness set point is like a thermostat setting. So, you know, people who win the lottery think, oh, if I win the lottery, I’ll be happy, you would be For a couple of months, but within about a year you would return to your happiness set point.
The same is true of people who have tragedies happen usually within a year or so, they return to their happiness set point. So the set point is key and here’s how it’s determined. It’s 50% genetic, you’re born with that. Now I was not born with the good genes on that, It’s only 10% your circumstances, Here’s what people are busy trying to change to be happy is their circumstances. It’s only 10% of the equation. The other 40% is our habits of thoughts and behavior and that’s where we can really move the needle. But I’m gonna take this a step further. Scientists in the field of epigenetic like Dr. Bruce Lipton who wrote the biology of belief. They say that when we change our habits we also can influence our genes that D. N. A. That 50% is the genetic piece which means that 90% of our happiness set point can be shifted by changing our old habits. Now. To me this should be headline news. This should be taught in all the schools we know what it takes for people to be happier. It takes changing certain habits and I just wanna take a moment if I can and go through those habits and this will lead us into the miracle zone if that’s okay.
Jana Danielson
Let’s do it.
Marci Shimoff
Alright. So I found there were 21 main happiness habits and they fell into seven areas. And so I’m gonna go through these seven areas with you and I want you to think to you know as I go through these to think where am I the weakest? So I want everybody to identify where they’re the weakest because that’s your achilles heel and that’s where you want to start in terms of raising your happiness. So the seven areas, it’s hard to remember seven of anything. So I created a metaphor, I call it, building your inner home for happiness. So your inner home for happiness. A home has seven main areas, a foundation for corner pillars, a roof and a garden. And here’s how this relates to happiness. The foundation is taking responsibility for your life and your happiness. It’s being a victor in life, not a victim and you know you’re a victim when you blame shame or complain. So the starting place is taking responsibility for your life and your happiness no matter what your circumstances are. Then the four corner pillars are the pillar of the mind, our thoughts, the heart, Do you live with an open heart? People who are happy, always have an open heart. They are generous, they are loving, they are kind, they forgive easily. Then there’s the pillar of the body.
Do you have the biochemistry of happiness? Do you have enough serotonin oxytocin? Endorphins Gabba, that by the way, was where I was weak and then and then the pillar of the soul, do you feel connected to the greater energy of the universe? I don’t care what you call it, whether you call it God, the divine nature, creative intelligence doesn’t matter. It’s that you feel like you are connected to a bigger energy, then there’s the roof and the roof has to do with your purpose in life. Are you living a purposeful passionate life? Are you waking up inspired, doing what it is, you’re, you know, you’re here to be doing, and then finally the garden and that has to do with who you surround yourself with. Do you surround yourself with roses and gardenia as you know, people who are cheering you on and supportive or do you surround yourself with some, some weeds, the people who are dragging you down? So those are the seven areas and Janet you’re gonna be my guinea pig. Where are you the weakest?
Jana Danielson
I am the weakest. I would say that I’m working in my garden right now. Yeah,
Marci Shimoff
That’s a very common one, it’s very, you know, and it’s hard because sometimes the negative people in our lives are the people that we work with, we can’t avoid it, people that we live with our families, and so we have to become skillful in how do we handle that situation? And the other thing is, especially if you’ve challenges with the people that you’re around, make sure that you find yourself another circle of support of like minded, like hearted people who don’t think you’re crazy for thinking that, you know, you can go for your dreams and you can and you can be happier and all of that, it’s so important to surround yourself with support.
Jana Danielson
So good. And I love the analogy and I think that that’s one way for us to really, you know, anchor into these seven areas of happiness.
Marci Shimoff
And so, you know, and I want to go more deeply into what are some of the things we can specifically do for some of these areas. But let me ask the question, answer the question that you asked initially about miracles. So what I found is that as people become happier happy, everything in life is an energetic vibration. Happiness is an energetic vibration. You get around somebody who’s unhappy and you can feel it right? It’s like this is a drag, there is an energy there, you get around someone who’s happy and it’s contagious. Oh, this feels really good. I like this.
People who live in what I call the miracle zone are people who are vibrating in a higher energetic vibration. And so what do I mean by the miracle zone, let me talk about miracles. Webster says that a miracle is a surprise and welcome event that can’t be explained by science that’s often attributed to grace Like race, you know, can’t create miracles, miracles are a gift of the universe, but what we can do is we can create the conditions for miracles to flow more in our lives. And that’s what I have seen. I’ve spent the last 10 years, you know researching this and teaching this and what I have seen is that it is possible to live in more and more and more in this place called the miracle zone. You know, athletes talk about the zone living in the zone, this is living in the zone in life, you know, it’s like where life is just you know the wind is at your back and life is more in the flow. So that’s the miracle zone.
Jana Danielson
So do you have, because I think we are a society that loves hearing stories and so do you have examples that you can share with us from your work miracles?
Marci Shimoff
Sure. Let me start by sharing an example that blew my mind. It was in one of the early chicken soup for the soul books and and this is where I started really seeing that you know the miraculous is so prevalent because so many the chicken soup for the soil stories were about miracles, things couldn’t be explained, you know, it was like wow, that’s pretty amazing. So this one story is about a man named Marcel Sternberger and this took place back in the 1948. Marcel was a very methodical man and every day he would take the subway the same train into work in New York City. This one day he stopped to see a friend and he took a totally different train. So randomly he was on a different train and and as he got on there was only one seat left, so we went and sat down in that seat and he noticed that the man sitting next to him was reading a Hungarian newspaper and Marcel was Hungarian, so he turned to the man and you know he said you know what’s your name?
And the guy said my name is Bela Paskin. And they started talking and it turns out that Bella had just arrived a few months earlier in New York from Europe. And had he shared a story about how he’d been in the war and how he had many atrocities happening and he was war. And when he got back he had to walk back miles after the war was over to his hometown and Hungary only to discover that his whole family had had died and most of the town had died and he was devastated. His beloved wife had been killed and after a few years he finally made his way from America. Well this story sounded very familiar to Marcel and he said he had been at a party earlier in the week and met someone with a similar story, a woman with a similar story. And so he said to Bella, what’s your wife’s name? And Bella said oh my wife, she’s been dead for years but her name was Maria and Marcel said to Bella we have to get off at the next stop and they got off at the next stop and they ran to a payphone and he called the phone number that he had written and he had in his pocket from the woman he met at the party and he said to the woman, what was your husband’s name? And she said, oh my husband’s been dead for years. But his name was Bela Paskin. He handed the phone to Bella and he said say hello to your wife. I know I call him god bumps. Did you get chills?
Jana Danielson
Like well yeah,
Marci Shimoff
It happened on a Brooklyn subway. So there you go. You know, I mean the likelihood of him getting on the different train that he gets on, there’s one seat available. Okay, that’s the extreme of miracles. But the everyday garden variety of miracles is I need $930 to pay the bill and I don’t have it. I get a check in the mail for $930 today. How’s that happen? Or even you know, 950 doesn’t have to be exact. You know, it’s just being in that flow. It’s having people who have health challenges and their doctors say, you know, it’s not possible for you to do this. And they do the things that keep them in the miracle zone and they have health miracles. So we have money miracles, Health miracles. Meeting your soulmate miracles. I mean just every whole gamut because it’s about just in general putting your life in that zone where life works okay. So how do we do it?
Jana Danielson
How do we do it? That’s the next question.
Marci Shimoff
So there are so many different things that we can do to put ourselves more in the miracle zone. But it’s about really being in the flow of life. And one of the ways is we’ll go back to my areas of the heart of happiness. One of them is living open heartedly leading with the heart. You know what we see is that people live most of their lives from their head. Now our minds are wonderful servants, but they’re not great masters and people who were the in the flow lead with love lead with their open heartedness and they let their mind follow the commands of the heart. So one of the things that we do is that we connect in with creating a more coherent state of the heart. And what this means is there’s a wonderful organization called the Institute of HeartMath and they’re the world’s leaders of the heart and happiness. And what they found is that if we are angry or frustrated for just five minutes, it can weaken our immune systems for up to six hours. But when we’re feeling grateful or openhearted or appreciative, it can strengthen our immune systems for up to six hours.
Now these days we want to have strong immune systems. Right? So I’m gonna show you a practice that they taught me takes not five minutes, It takes two minutes. And what it does is it moves us into what they call heart rhythm coherence where our heart rhythms are more in a uniform line, uniform wave. And that’s what puts us more. What’s one of the things that can put us in the miracle zone? So very simple process. I want everybody to do it, Jana. I’m gonna ask you to do it with me and we’re gonna ask you at the end how you feel any different than you do now. So if you’re watching this, do it along with us, you will get nothing out watching us do it. Okay, so we want everybody to experience it for yourself. So first start with your eyes closed. You can do it with eyes open, but it’s deeper with your eyes closed. There’s three steps. The first step is to simply place the palm of your hand on your heart. That simple act of putting your hand on your heart starts the flow of a chemical called oxytocin, which is known as the bonding hormone, the love hormone. What we feel when we feel more bonded with other people, just putting your hand on your own heart stimulates the flow of oxytocin. Now the second step is to imagine that you’re breathing in and out through the center of your heart. It’s called heart focused breathing.
So imagine that your breath, your inhale is going into your heart, can go deeper into your belly. But it needs to come in through your heart and your exhale goes back out through your heart. So at your own pace you’re inhaling in through your heart and exhaling out through your heart. You may already notice that you’re starting to feel a little bit of a shift in your energy. Now the third step is that on each inhale imagine that you are breathing in your heart and your breathing in love, ease and compassion. You’re exhaling out of your heart and each inhale you’re breathing in love, ease and compassion at your own pace. Now you can remember a time when you felt love, ease or compassion, you can think about it. Somebody who helps you feel that way or beloved four legged or you can just quietly to yourself silently say the words love, ease and compassion. Any of those are effective and one more time breathe deeply into your heart. Love, ease and compassion. And on your exhale you can slowly move your hand away when you feel ready. You can slowly open your eyes So as you’re opening your eyes I want everyone to notice how do you feel any different than you did just two minutes ago. And so Jama your you said you’d be my guinea pig, How do you feel any different either physically or emotionally or both?
Jana Danielson
So physically I feel warmer and yet I feel lighter. Like I don’t feel like here I feel the sense of warmth like as if someone was giving me a hug but I like I said, I feel I feel light. And I could feel myself physically smiling as I was listening. I wasn’t smiling when I started but I could feel the angle of my lips change as I was following your guided instructions. And yeah, like emotionally, I just like I mean I just it wasn’t like I was not happy when we because I have you here, but there’s just A level and I love that you showed in two minutes. The tool because I think sometimes we get stuck in, I call it E or I feel like sometimes every person can be connected to a character from Winnie the pooh. And I feel like some days were like er right, we’re like that little donkey, we have the little pink bow on our tail, but everything is just like Heavy or you know, there’s a there’s a 90% chance that it won’t rain, but there’s still 10% chance, right? I’m feeling very like tigerish, very excited and the shift in two minutes was remarkable. So, thank you for sharing.
Marci Shimoff
So what, what you started to shift into is what science actually calls the love response sciences. We’ve all heard of the stress response and we know what that you know, we know what that feels like you’re and it’s actually a change in your brain activity. A change in your heart rhythms and a change in your biochemistry when you go into the stress response. But they’ve also found that there’s something called the love response. It has its own brain waves, heart rhythms and biochemistry. And it feels like this, you know, and here’s the deal doing this once and nothing’s gonna change in your life. It’s a nice experience. But so what, right, here’s what will really create a shift in your life. If you do this a couple of times a day, for the next two weeks, you would start to habituate beloved response. It will become more and more your default state. I’ve done this thousands of times. All I have to do now is go like this, but my hand up to my heart and immediately the whole you know, my I have my body has this memory of that. So I recommend your homework is try this 2-3 times a day for the next two weeks and I do this when I’m sitting on the phone with somebody, they don’t have to know it. I could be standing in line the grocery store if there’s a long line and instead of getting frustrated, I’ll do this, practice it changes things. So that’s the thing, as you said, it’s simple, it’s just simple and that’s what I found. It’s a lot of little simple habits that we can take on to shift into living more in the miracle zone.
Jana Danielson
You call it the heart resonance or tell me what you call this?
Marci Shimoff
Heart rhythm coherence.
Jana Danielson
Heart rhythm coherence. Okay, people here in the audience, I’m also taking notes and I can tell you that I have not, I don’t always take notes with my speakers. So I hope you are frantically also writing unless you have the V. I. P. Package, which you’ll be able to watch this back then. So, okay, so that was fantastic. And do you truly believe in your heart that anyone can do this?
Marci Shimoff
I know it. So I have, you know, worked with hundreds of thousands of people around happiness and more recently around living in the miracle zone. I have a program called your Year of miracles and it’s a year long program where where we actually look at every area of our life, where we can have miracles, miracles in your health, miracles, in your success, miracles and your money, miracles in your in your self love and and creating your biggest dreams and I just absolutely know that this is possible for anybody no matter where you are, when you start, it’s and it’s not hard.
Jana Danielson
Okay, alright, and so as we’re talking about miracles and happiness and making these inspired actions, what do you think based on, you know, you have this long beautiful career in helping people transform. These days, what do you feel is not being talked about enough,
Marci Shimoff
Mm I think the general idea of happiness is so sorely missing from our our education, our life. You know, if you ask people what they want, they’re gonna say I want this whatever it is and then you say why do you want that? The answer is always because I think I’ll be happier. The ultimate goal is happiness. You know, Aristotle said that happiness is the be all and end all of life and we actually know how, you know, we’ve cracked that happiness code, we know how people can be happier and this should be taught in the schools, this should be, you know, what is more important than teaching kids at a young age how to be happier. And I think we have so much emphasis on on all the bad stuff that there’s a lot of good stuff that’s out there, you know, I let me just share one other little tip that I think is really important for people and it’s it’s about our brain, our brain patterns, you know, the only difference between people who live in the miracle zone or people who are happier and people who aren’t is their habits. That is really the only difference. They have different habits and one of the biggest areas of habits that need help are the habits of the mind.
The habits of our thoughts. You know, we put one of the principles I teach in your year of miracles is to choose where you put your energy and attention because what we put our attention on, what grows stronger in our life and our minds dictate where we’re putting our energy and attention and most of us put our energy and attention on what is working in our life rather than what is working and we get more of what isn’t working. And I just want to share with you some brain science about how we change our neural pathways in the brain so that we have more of what we want, easily more habitually. So there are three simple practices, three simple steps to change to creating new neural pathways in the brain for the positive. Let me let me back up a little bit. According to the research, The average person has 60,000 thoughts a day And for the average person, 80% of those are negative. It’s called the negativity bias. Don’t feel bad if you have it. We inherited from our caveman ancestors who needed to remember the negative in order to survive, but we no longer have that same kind of need for that.
My good friend Rick Hansen who are the hard wiring happiness, he says that our minds are like velcro for the negative, they just stick to us, but they’re like teflon for the positive, the positive slide off of us. So you get 10 compliments in a day and one criticism, what do you remember at the end of the day, you remember the criticism, happier people don’t happier people, Bell Crow, the good stuff and teflon, the negative, here’s how you do that, number one, you be on the lookout for the good, this is how we create new neural pathways in the brain. You actually pretend. Well this is one of the things that somebody I interviewed said that they did to be happier. She pretends that she’s the Academy Awards committee and her job every day is to give out five academy awards. So she’ll be out for a walk and she’ll see a cute fluffy little white dog and she’ll say that dog gets the cutest dog of the Day award. You know, it’s just a game that you play that you’re looking for the good. And if you’ve got kids do this game with your kids, start them off with this five things at least a day that you’re giving an academy work too. So that’s the first step. It trains the mind to be on the look at. Second step, savor the good for at least 20 seconds in order for it to make a difference to actually create start to create new neural pathways in the brain, we have to be on that good thing for 20 seconds or more. We don’t have to be on the negative for anywhere near that because we’re so habituated for the negative, but the good to actually be installed in our bodies in our minds rick, Hansen says, we have to savor it for 20 seconds.
So if you see that cute little white dog, you don’t just go, oh there’s a cute white dog, you go over to the owner and you say that is that dog gets the cutest dog of the day award. I’m giving it the academy award and you start talking about it. So you focus on it for at least 20 seconds, you see a beautiful sunset, you don’t go, that’s a beautiful sunset, you take it in like you’re taking in a meal like oh I’m savoring that sunset. So that’s the second step to savor. And the third step is to go for a 3 to 1 ratio which means three positives for every one negative. The negatives are gonna happen automatically. So don’t worry about it, don’t beat yourself up for it. That’s just adding insult to injury. Quickly replace it for three thing 11 negative. Quickly replace it with three things that you notice that are positive and that tends to shift the energy and create the new neural pathways so it might sound all airy fairy. But actually it’s science.
Jana Danielson
This, this conversation has brought me so much joy because the part of the vision of this week is to offer people these bite sized pieces of digestible aha moments and Marci like this conversation has been jam packed with so much of that and so I just want to thank you for how you have, you know shown up here and of all the little, you know, tools and tricks that you have shared with us today, Is there one or two that just resonate with you, that you’re like this? These are my go tos.
Marci Shimoff
Yes, there definitely are. I’ll give you two, one of them has to do, you know, the biggest thing I’ve found that causes people to not be in the miracle zone to be outside of that is lack of feeling worthy, you know, I don’t feel worthy of my good and you think, oh that’s crazy, of course I’m worthy. We tend to resist our good, we push it away. We, because of lack of self love most people really didn’t have and I’m not talking about self esteem. Self esteem is I like myself because I’m good at this or I, whatever I’m talking about self love, that’s unconditional, I love myself, no matter what I forgive myself, I have compassion for myself, that’s what we need in order to be more open to miracles. Like and I’ll tell you a quick story about this in my own life. Years ago I was at a workshop, it was, I think in the nineties, mid nineties with with someone I loved a mentor at the time, she’s now a very dear friend of mine, Marianne, Williamson and Marianne was saying that if you make a lot of money and you don’t, you haven’t raised your consciousness to receive this new level of money, You will lose it. And I thought to myself, that’s ridiculous. That would never happen to me if I made a lot of money.
Oh no, I would keep that. Well sure enough, A couple of years later, my chicken soup for the Soul Book started coming out and I was making much more money than I was used to. And sure enough, I started to lose it. I had not changed my consciousness to be able to feel the worthiness of keeping that. Fortunately I remembered what Marianne said and I started really working on that and changing, changing the dynamics. But this is what happens that we tend to be our own worst enemies, blocking our own miracles from coming our way. So one of the things that’s a go to for me is to develop greater self love is to ask myself a very simple question. And I want you to write this question down on a post it or a piece of paper because I want you to ask yourself this question a couple times a day. Question is what’s the most loving thing I could do for myself right now? Simple question. What’s the most loving thing I could do for myself right now and then go do it. Most of us are used to trying to think what’s the most loving thing I could do for this person or that person or this person. But what about ourselves? We need to train ourselves with self loving habits. So right now, what’s the most loving thing I can do is I can take a sip of water. It could be as simple as that. It could be. I could call a friend to get some support.
It could be, I could go move my body a little bit because my body’s needs movement. It doesn’t matter what the answer is. It matters that you’re paying attention to what your own needs are. So that’s 11 thing. The second thing I’m gonna bring up is a little practice that I do with my husband every day that really shifted our relationship and it’s called the appreciation game. All you do is you spend 30 seconds telling the other person a few things that you appreciate about them and then they do it to you. We start our mornings that way. We end our evenings that way. And it changes the energy because again, what you put your attention on is what grows stronger in your life. I just want, I’m gonna do this for just not even 30 seconds. I’m gonna do it for 10 seconds with you, Jenna. And I want everybody to notice how you feel when I do this to you and then I’ll let you do it to me. We’ll do a little 12th exchange. So Jana, one of the things that I really appreciate about you is your loving energy. I can feel in your field, how caring and loving you are. And another thing I appreciate about you is what a great listener you’ve been and how affirming you’ve been to me in this process. And another thing I appreciate is your great dedication and enthusiasm to bringing this summit to people because you know it can help their lives.
Jana Danielson
Mm So Marci, I appreciate the first of all the fact that you took the time to listen to my invitation for the summit, to say yes to show up today. I appreciate how elegantly and eloquently you offer your information since we know that not everyone is wired for this amazing life that they can have and the hope, I appreciate the hope. I appreciate the joy and I appreciate the nuggets that have been planted, the little seeds that have been planted because in this moment it’s not a coincidence that people are here listening to our conversation and I appreciate the way you’ve shown up. So that one day maybe it’s not today, maybe it’s tomorrow. These tools that you have gifted us can resonate and start to build a beautiful foundation with a strong roof and the pillars and the garden because we truly do all deserve a life full of purpose and love and happiness.
Marci Shimoff
Thank you. Thank you. So I want everybody to notice how do you feel, just even witnessing people appreciating each other that it feels good to be in the presence of that. So here’s what I want to suggest. I think I’ve given you maybe four or five practical things that you could start doing today or tomorrow. Do not do them all. Pick one, pick the one thing that most resonated with you about from this conversation and start doing it and just do it from the next week and just notice how what happens just be, you know, use your life as an experiment. People don’t don’t make change in their life because they try to take on too much. The baby step is what makes it work. So pick one little thing, do it. It won’t take more than two minutes. Anything I gave you does nothing I gave you took more than two minutes. So pick one thing for two minutes. Do it a few times over the next week and see what changes
Jana Danielson
Absolute like sparkly goodness in this conversation with you today, Marci. And again, thank you for being here and gracing our virtual stage here at the Medicine of Mindset summit.
Marci Shimoff
I’m so happy to have been here and I look forward to seeing people in future situations or whatever. And I know that you’re going to share how, how they can find out about the stuff I’m doing.
Jana Danielson
Yeah. Amazing. So you know what, let’s, we’ll have, we’ll have that information, but what is the best way for them to connect with you.
Marci Shimoff
So I, as I mentioned, I teach a program called your year of miracles. I have a free book, ebook that I offer to everybody. It’s called the four biggest mistakes that people keep people from living in the miracle zone. And I have four really practical cool things in there that you can do to live more miraculously. And that’s just it. I think you’ll give the link to that, is that right?
Jana Danielson
I mean you can.
Marci Shimoff
Okay, it’s at miraclesebook.com miraclesebook.com and Jana, you know, I just want to, the last thing I would love to share if I can is people always ask me, is it selfish, is it selfish to want to be happier? Isn’t it selfish to kind of be focusing on your own life and living in the miracle zone when we’ve got so much, so many problems in the world. And my answer is I believe it’s the least selfish thing you could possibly do because when you’re happier when you’re living or miraculous life, it affects everybody around you. And ultimately, I think it’s the best thing that we can do for the world. And there’s a beautiful Chinese proverb that I love, that kind of sums up why I’m so passionate about this and it goes like this. It says when there is light in the soul, there will be beauty in the person when there’s beauty in the person, there will be harmony in the house when there is harmony in the house, there will be order in the nation. And when there is order in the nation, there will be peace in the world. And my prayer and my wish for all of us is that we know that light in our own souls and through that we help create peace here on this planet of ours.
Jana Danielson
Oh my gosh! What an amazing way to finish this conversation. Thank you again, Marci everyone that has been here. Just take a moment before you come back for our next speaker. Take a moment and just if you can get outside or get your feet on the ground or just just get away from your phone or your laptop for a minute and just allow this to resonate with you, let it sink in. And we will see you back here at the Medicine of Mindset Summit with our next amazing speaker.
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