Full Transcript Opening Banter and Coffee Jokes 0:00 Your cortisol is always really high. 0:02 It's maximum. 0:03 My heart rate is 355 right now. 0:05 And I'm having a double espresso. 0:07 That's your third coffee of the day. 0:10 But you drink coffee like water. 0:13 We all know this. 0:13 I don't do that. 0:14 You're in denial. 0:15 Cigarettes maybe but not coffee. 0:22 All right, welcome back. 0:23 Another episode of Sibling RX. 0:26 I'm Dr. 0:26 Roddy. 0:27 And we have, conveniently, we Dr Yas, her mouth tape today, which is like a dream come true. 0:33 So I am going to do all the talking today. 0:37 Today we are talking about family businesses. 0:41 We have talked a little bit about our background and what we do. 0:45 When siblings work together, you work with any family members, some of you guys listening or watching may have that situation. 0:51 I figured a perfect way for us to talk about this is to tape her mouth so she can't contribute whatsoever. 0:57 No, but in all seriousness, is that like a waxing too?
Mouth Tape and Breathing Habits 1:02 It'll wax your upper lip? 1:08 Yes. 1:09 Well, that was a fun 13 seconds of bliss that lasted 13. Uh, we never talked about that tape before, did we? 1:17 No, no. 1:19 You want to tell them what that is? 1:20 Yeah. 1:20 So there's a couple of different brands you can get. 1:23 I just got a cheap brand on Amazon, but it just helps people train to keep their mouth closed. 1:31 A lot of people are mouth breathers and don't realize it. 1:33 And that affects your entire microbiome in your mouth, which in turn, is one of the first ways to affect your gut microbiome because what you're breathing 1:43 in through your mouth goes into your system directly. 1:47 So it really helps with not just the microbiomes portion of your health but also it helps structurally so that kids that are maybe they suck their thumbs 2:01 or They have a really arched palate from other reasons. 2:04 Like my daughter had, she was a thumb sucker, but she also had a very severely deviated septum. 2:11 So even though we fixed her septal and she doesn't suck her thumb anymore, thank God she's 15. But she still has a high palate and they did the oral expander 2:24 for the palate expender before she got braces. 2:27 Um, but now with everything being fixed structurally, she's still not used to using her nose because for so long she couldn't breathe through her knows. 2:37 So I'm trying to retrain her to breathe her mouth. 2:41 I don't have her sleeping with it at night yet because it freaks her out. 2:45 But during the day to school, right? 2:48 Right. 2:48 Actually I have, her more importantly, I had her wear it home when we're all up so that she doesn't talk. 2:54 That's messed up. 2:56 Yeah. 2:56 Forced it. 2:58 That cool. 2:59 So today we're kind of going to pivot a little bit from health and wellness. 3:06 Any of that stuff. 3:07 I thought it would be a cool topic to talk about how do people that work in a family business coexist without killing each other,
Why Family Businesses Are Challenging 3:17 having restraining orders, or things like that. 3:21 So we've been in business successfully for almost 25 years, 25 next February. 3:28 And a little bit of background, we worked together with our mom for many, many years. 3:33 20, 20 years, 19 years. 3:39 Well, yeah, she started the business with me. 3:43 Yeah. 3:44 And then she was with us for 20 in the businesses. 3:49 Which was great. 3:50 It's a great way to get close to somebody in your family, but it has its challenges, which we'll get into. 3:59 And then I know you've brought this up a couple of times already, then how the dynamic of that changed after she passed and how we figured out a way to 4:08 balance stuff, you know, because it's kind of like a massive reorg that you're not prepared for. 4:15 Yeah, especially when she handled. 4:16 Wait, first, can you put your phone on like, do my phone is on vibrate? 4:19 No, Do not disturb. 4:20 I don't know how to do that. 4:23 It's the top. 4:25 You know. 4:25 How there's a focus thing. 4:26 No, my phone doesn't focus. 4:27 Yeah, phone does not do that. 4:31 Give me your phone. 4:32 Oh, I think I just saw it. 4:33 Let's see here. 4:34 Is it the red one? 4:36 Give you your. 4:36 Don't mess up my settings. 4:39 So see, that's good. 4:41 That's what coworkers do. 4:45 So yeah, so a lot of that changed. 4:47 And then during those 20 years, we had a lots of different things that happened. 4:53 Life things happened, you had life things, I had live things. 4:57 Meanwhile, were still running a business, trying to maintain that. 5:01 You had to step out for a while to deal with stuff, just not as available and stuff. 5:07 So we have to kind of restructure. 5:10 For me, it's always been, when you're in the office or when your work mode, that's what your mode. 5:16 You know, trying not to bring family stuff to work and obviously not trying to take work stuff home. 5:22 I mean, yeah, I don't think I think we do a pretty good job maintaining just work, stuff at work. 5:28 And then, you know unless like something happened and I could see you were bothered by something personally or I'm bothered something personal and then 5:36 we're able to talk to each other during the day. 5:38 But yeah. 5:42 We do a good job keeping it professional, but I also feel like... 5:48 The downside of all of it is that we were so close growing up always. 5:54 We even in chiropractic school, we didn't go to the same undergrad clearly, but definitely did not go wildcats. 6:03 So yeah, Harvard of STDs. 6:05 Hey, what number one in everything, innovation and STDS. 6:09 It's okay, it's still number 1. Right. 6:11 Yeah. 6:13 But, and we live together in Chiropractics school but I feel like working together has put a, has made us a little bit farther apart. 6:24 Even though we live next to each other, we don't hang out like we used to hang. 6:29 Yeah. 6:29 Right. 6:29 But it's life. 6:30 It's not, for me, it not like, Oh, let's try not to. 6:33 Hang out. 6:34 No, no, I think it just, is a combination of like. 6:36 We always see each. 6:37 Other, but then also like our kids have different interests. 6:41 You know, We just have. 6:42 Now if you wore the tape more often, right. 6:46 I'm sure that would be, you know. 6:48 No, I think you're right. 6:49 You're like going a million miles an hour during the week. 6:52 And then when you when your weekends or nights hit, which is this is no excuse. 6:57 It's kind of like you don't want to. 6:59 be around that other stuff, even though we don't hate what we do. 7:02 We love, we love nobody. 7:04 I mean, for me, I'm not like, oh my gosh, two more days till Friday. 7:08 Oh, it's Sunday night and we got it. 7:09 You know, you know I've never thought that way and I am not being like a weird optimist, but it is just I don t feel that. 7:16 The day I feel like that is the day that I have to be like all right, all I got to do is I m out. 7:22 I look forward to my weekends. 7:24 I like the challenges of the week, you know, and then sometimes during it you're like, oh my God, this is annoying, but we have really amazing people in 7:34 our organization and they take such a burden off of us and our family, I think we've always treated them like family. 7:41 One thing I was thinking about. 7:44 You run on such an intense frequency. 7:47 Always. 7:48 Always. 7:49 Don't be scared. 7:49 Right. 7:49 Like your cortisol is always really high.
Roles, Communication, and Structure 7:52 It's maximum. 7:53 My heart rate is 355 right now. 7:55 Yeah. 7:56 And I'm having a double espresso. 7:57 That's your third coffee of the day. 8:00 But you drink coffee like water. 8:01 So anyways, we all know this. 8:03 I don't do that. 8:04 You're in denial. 8:05 Cigarettes maybe, but not coffee. 8:08 Tobacco, cigarettes, whatever. 8:10 Zins, the new. 8:11 A dip and I smoke at the same time. 8:13 Then I have a hookah nest on my desk. 8:18 Which explains all your inflammation? 8:20 But anyways, we did that Colby score where is like you you base It's an assessment based on how how you it's not even a personality It was more like a 8:30 work assessment of like how do you function at work? 8:33 And it was interesting because we scored fairly similar more similar than our other our Other exec team but we're so different because like I'm a little 8:48 bit more of an introvert where I need to recharge and like reassess and I don't function without doing my breath work in the morning. 8:56 If I miss my breathe work, my stress levels are through the roof during the day because I work with you. 9:05 Yeah. 9:06 Perfect. 9:07 Yeah, so, but then you're the opposite. 9:10 Like you just like wake up. 9:13 The other night we were in Flagstaff together, right? 9:16 And you fell asleep on the couch and I couldn't wake you up, we're watching TV and it was late and i'm like, let's just go to bed. 9:23 And I was trying to get you. 9:25 Up and you wouldn't. 9:26 Wake up and. 9:27 I kept saying Rod wake. 9:29 from like the other side of the room. 9:30 Wake up. 9:31 And you, you were dead asleep. 9:33 You were like snoring. 9:34 Your dead to sleep. 9:35 So then I walked over to you and I shook your foot and the entire room like I was like, Oh my God, You woke up so startled. 9:47 I scared me. 9:51 Oh, my god. 9:51 He's like stress. 9:52 Even when he's sleeping. 9:53 No, I'm not. 9:55 Anyways, but you just run on a different frequency. 9:57 When I lay down, I'm out. 9:59 I know. 10:00 And then when you wake up, it's like... 10:02 I make it a point to get up before my alarm. 10:04 Like I am ready to go and I don't have to have a cup of coffee. 10:08 You have an IV coffee? 10:11 Yeah, that's right. 10:12 It's an espresso IV. 10:14 The other thing people I think sometimes perceive that, oh, you work with your family. 10:18 That must be so great. 10:19 Or you worked with family, so it is great to be able to trust your Yes, for us, absolutely. 10:27 That's been the story. 10:28 Well, you hear people that work with their family and some family like to hurt family. 10:33 They think, well, it's family, I'm gonna hurt them, but they're not gonna leave because they are family so just because you're family it doesn't mean that 10:41 you should cut corners in, For example, partnership agreements, operating agreements. 10:48 What do you call it? 10:50 Organizational charts, all the things that, kind of like a B plus at, you know, we're not like A plus bulletproof, but we have that stuff together, 10:59 right? 10:59 We have to update it regularly. 11:01 But I think sometimes people think when you work with family, oh, it's fine. 11:05 And that's when, unfortunately, families kind husband and wife or brothers or sisters or family businesses that don't have their stuff together because 11:16 they just assume we're in this safety umbrella. 11:19 Well, it's my family. 11:20 They're not going to run with the money. 11:22 And they're going walk all over me. 11:24 It happens all the time. 11:26 I mean, luckily, knock on wood, we don' have that issue. 11:29 No, no. 11:30 Not that you know of at least. 11:31 Yeah, I have heard and I know so many partnerships that are siblings or parents and kids and they've just disintegrated. 11:44 It's sad. 11:45 You think you're in a safe place and you think it's going to be easier to work with family and at times it can be but at time it is more challenging than easy. 11:58 you know, and the things that should be easy should, be given like trust, you, know and just reliability and dependability. 12:06 But sometimes those things just don't, they don, don t work. 12:10 And it's really unfortunate. 12:12 Yeah. 12:12 I think there's just an assumption that it s going to be there. 12:15 They'll be, there for me, but it doesn't mean that you take advantage of it. 12:20 Um, I, think for us, um, defining our roles, which again, give us a B plus in that. 12:27 Yeah. 12:27 Cause so much happens at once. 12:29 Um, and we, we tend to do so. 12:31 Much of everything. 12:33 You know, where it's like, there's no clear line. 12:35 Okay. 12:36 you handle this and I handle. 12:38 But you know it. 12:39 Because we have so many things going on at one time. 12:43 And again, I was thinking about it just on that call I. 12:45 Was on before when I walked in here today and. 12:48 I Was thinking. 12:48 About when. 12:51 call without mentioning it, like, do we need to do this right now? 12:54 You know, I was thinking about that, but I tend to function better when I have a lot of projects and I kind of categorize them like this is pressing, 13:04 we to this now, this one's on kind like the back burner and this ones on like five burners back, you know? 13:11 And I know for people around me, that can be overwhelming. 13:14 Maybe you sometimes, maybe when mom was around, overwhelming, but I tend to have to different things that I can touch. 13:23 And as they become more visible, then I'm like, okay, now that's a front burner thing. 13:28 Now that we have deal with that, whatever that is. 13:32 For me, it's all always growth or solving a problem or fulfilling a need. 13:39 Obviously, we're entrepreneurs, so we want to monetize, but we also need to make sure as healthcare providers, what is the need that we are fulfilling? 13:46 What is whole that were filling? 13:48 Anyway, that's tangent. 13:50 I'm just thinking about that. 13:51 But I function. 13:57 not stress, but overstimulated in a way to be able to accomplish those other things.
Coping After Their Motheru2019s Passing 14:02 Yeah. 14:02 No, your high quarters all function. 14:03 I just, I don't, and I'm like a, let me go meditate for a second. 14:09 That's a clear way that we're different. 14:11 Um, communication is important. 14:13 It's very difficult to carve out time. 14:17 and say, hey, let's touch base. 14:18 Because sometimes for me, it's like, I don't have the patience to re-explain everything. 14:24 I'm like hey if you weren't there when this discussion happened, sorry, like I, don' want to go through it again. 14:29 It's I wish I could have recorded it, but I think communication's important when you're working with family of whatever capacity. 14:35 In this case, its siblings, other people could be different things. 14:38 Communication, think it important to carve out that time and kind of go, what's going on in your, work world, like, what do I need to know about and what 14:47 you need about? 14:48 And that could be a 30 minute conversation once a week. 14:51 It could a 15 minute while we're independently driving home or whatever. 14:56 You know what I mean? 14:57 We used to have our weekly Wednesday meetings, which were good, but we just don't have time for that now. 15:03 I know they're filled with other things, but I think communication is important. 15:06 I Think documenting things and making sure that, you know, God forbid something were to happen, that the company is in order. 15:13 Like things are in place, operating agreements, buy, sell agreements. 15:18 Dissolution agreements those are all in play. 15:20 So that way, You know you, don't have an issue if something tragic were happen. 15:26 We were a three way partnership with our mom. 15:28 And when that happened, It was like, thank goodness we had what we have. 15:35 It wasn't easy, especially dealing with all that stuff. 15:39 And she was well-prepared, right? 15:40 Yeah. 15:41 Oh yeah, it was because of her. 15:42 Yeah, her law background helped with that. 15:45 So, but yeah. 15:47 Um, yeah it's, It definitely changed the dynamic because more, I feel like she passed away, what? 15:56 Six years ago. 15:57 Right before COVID. 15:58 No, during COVID, Yeah 21. Um, but it puts so much more on each one of our plates. 16:07 Like the amount of workload that we now have is, I'd say double for both of us. 16:14 Yeah. 16:14 Easily. 16:15 And then dealing with that and how do you go through that crisis, personal crisis pandemic, right? 16:23 You know, the world turned upside down and how do you manage through that? 16:27 So I, I sometimes think we got through, that we can get through anything because that was like so many on so levels. 16:34 So many different layers of emotion, you know where, we had to take the personal side of it and then handle. 16:42 I remember when she was passing away and I had a rush to her account and make sure that everything was transferred. 16:50 Do you remember that? 16:51 Otherwise they would have frozen her liquid assets. 16:57 That's one beauty of working with family is just knowing that that stuff will get done. 17:00 But again, I don't think people should cut corners if they're working family. 17:04 I think that they should just assume certain things are getting done, you have to delegate, document, circle back, have structure, 17:13 all those things. 17:14 There's obviously a lot of great perks. 17:18 advantages in working with a family member or family members. 17:22 And I think one of the neatest things I see is when a Family business is handed down generation after generation, you know,
Family Business Pros, Cons, and Core Values 17:28 really common in the restaurant industry and other industries too. 17:30 I mean, that's, it's cool if you have kids that want to take over what you do or it has been handed to you from like your great grandfather and whatnot. 17:39 Ours definitely don't want that. 17:40 No, no, I don t think so. 17:42 and I do not blame them. 17:43 But that is always neat to see because that means that they have a really good model and And they've let it evolve naturally from when they started 50 17:51 years ago to today. 17:52 You know, those people, the people that started to let, let evolve and not just stuck with the old ways. 17:58 So it's kind of cool to see. 18:00 And when we were starting out too, people loved, Like I remember when you joined the practice, everyone loved that we brother and sister were working together, 18:09 you know, and we were in one office together. 18:12 We split days and then as we expanded, we rotated around, but everyone just loved. 18:17 So it was just, I can imagine people not liking some type of a family vibe. 18:23 And I think that, uh, that core value, like starting that way is something that we've done up and down with, like instilling that within the company, 18:33 whether it's, you know, people that we see in a day-to-day or clinics. 18:36 But I think overall, a lot of our team really understands that that's a part of identity and they try to embody those same kind of skills within their team, 18:48 of each individual office, which is good. 18:51 Because patients sense that. 18:52 Patients want to be a part of a family environment. 18:53 They don't want be apart of, you know, kind of cold, corporatey thing. 18:59 And we always encourage when employees have siblings that want work with us, we like that, like we have some cousins and sisters and what not that all 19:09 work for us. 19:10 So, yeah, it makes it more, the core values is more consistent. 19:18 Yeah, I think so too. 19:19 So, so I, thank you. 19:21 We said, we just, there's some perks and there are some challenges when you work with family. 19:25 I it's doable as long as you're organized and communication and, and roles are defined, you know, it could be a great thing, 19:33 You know? 19:34 And if you don't, It could an absolute nightmare. 19:37 Like we said earlier. 19:39 For instance, if we both were high cortisol, We would be 10 times more successful. 19:44 Ten times, maybe 20 times. 19:45 No, no, we would definitely like be self-destructive. 19:49 I think any organization, there's difference in personalities and that's what people grow, right? 19:55 Because you see a problem with a different set of lenses. 19:59 And we kind of go, how do we collaborate what we're seeing? 20:02 Take an average of what were seeing and problem solve. 20:04 So no I agree. 20:06 If two people were the same, two leaders were same that would be a problems. 20:10 Yeah, it's like you can't have two like you know, high spender people be married to each other. 20:18 You got to have one saver and one spanner, you now or two savers really. 20:22 But yeah, it's, or like too high, someone who wants to party all the time, You can't have two people that want to Party all that time. 20:29 Who's going to take care of the kids? 20:30 Yeah. 20:32 Themselves. 20:32 Yeah, that was good. 20:35 I mean, I think that it, people don't know that we started out as a family organization and I You know, of course it has its pros and cons of working together, 20:46 but overall if you can respect one another, balance each other out, and have good communication and things set in place to maybe eliminate future issues 20:59 if one member ends up, you know leaving or passing away, it'll just simplify things for you, so. 21:06 So if anybody listening or watching currently works or has worked with their family, we'd love to hear about your story.
Closing Thoughts and Listener Call to Action 21:13 So please comment below and let us know what are the ups and downs that you've experienced working with family. 21:22 I also think that it would be neat to get people that are in family businesses of different scopes and different fields to collaborate. 21:29 I've been a part of a lot of masterminds. 21:33 That'd be kind of interesting. 21:36 Comment below and let us know what your wins and struggles have been. 21:41 Please make sure you subscribe, like, share. 21:43 We appreciate the support and we'll talk to you soon. 21:46 Bye. 21:48 The information provided in this podcast is for educational and informational purposes only and is not intended as medical advice. 21:55 While we may be licensed healthcare professionals, this content should not be used to diagnose or treat any medical condition or to replace the advice 22:03 of your personal healthcare provider. 22:05 Always consult your doctor or a qualified health professional with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition. 22:12 Listening to this podcast does not create a doctor-patient relationship. 22:17 Reliance on any information provided is solely at your own risk.
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