Hope in Ketosis: Nancy and Jerry’s Road to Cognitive Recovery

Founder, Solcere Health Clinic and Marama
- Discover how ketogenic states and dietary changes, especially ketosis, improved clarity and cognition, and why these metabolic shifts matter to patients and caregivers.
- Understand the emotional rollercoaster of caregiving, from exhaustion to resentment to surrender, and how small rituals like naps, walks, and affirmations can help you stay grounded.
- Gain perspective on the caregiving journey from both sides—what it means to be present, to let go of perfection, and to keep choosing love, even when memory fades.
Full Transcript
Introduction to Jerry and Nancy's Story 0:00
And for me, you know, the caretaker, it's like, it's okay. It's okay to take a nap. It's okay to go eat. It's okay to walk away. It's okay to go out in nature. It's okay. And I think that's what I needed to hear. It's okay. Live in today. And I think that it's one of these things where it's practice. It's not perfect. A far cry. We are not doing the program perfectly. But if we fall off the horse, we're getting back into the saddle because we know that when we went into ketosis, when we are in ketosis, we can think clearly.
Both of us can think clearly. This is Doctor Talks. Real talk from real doctors on the issues that matter to you most. Welcome. In today's episode, I'm honored to introduce you to two incredibly inspiring people, Jerry and Nancy Nelson. This conversation is really close to my heart because they aren't just regular podcast guests. Jerry and Nancy joined me for the 12-week Reversing Alzheimer's Transformation Program. and they are living proof that it is possible to meet a diagnosis with both grace and courage.
I have seen them inspire others with my own eyes and I'm excited that they are here to share some of their journey with you so that you can be as inspired as I've been. Together, they're going to tell you about how they've navigated the journey of an Alzheimer's diagnosis with resilience and humor and a deep love and commitment for one another. You'll hear about daily practices they use, how they've implemented the Bredesen protocol at home, and how they continue to find hope, connection, and joy through the ups and downs of this difficult path.
Their story is one of transformation, not just in their health, but in mindset, relationships, and in purpose. I think you'll find their perspective uplifting, honest, and full of hard won wisdom. Let's dive in. Jerry and Nancy, welcome. I'm so excited to have you here. Right before we hit record, you were sharing one of the routines that you practice each day, and it's called Just for the Day. Would you mind sharing that with our listeners? No, I'd love to. Just for the day, I'll try to live through this day only and not tackle all my problems at once.
I can do something for 12 hours that would appall me. If I felt I had to keep it up for a lifetime, just for the day I'll be happy. This assumes to be true about Abraham Lincoln said that most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be. Just for the day I'll adjust myself to what is and try not to adjust everything to my own desires. I will take my luck as it comes and fit myself to it.
Just for Today Routine 2:56
Just for today, I will try to strengthen my mind. I will study. I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought, and concentration. Just for today, I will exercise my soul in three ways. I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out. If anyone knows of it, it will not count. I will do at least two things I don't want to do just for exercise. I will not show anyone that my feelings are hurt. They may be hurt, but today I will not show it.
Just for today, I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won't find fault with anything nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself. Got one over here. Just for today, I'll have a program. I may not follow it exactly, but I'll have it. I'll save myself from two pests, hurry and indecision. Just for today, I will have a quiet half hour all by myself and relax. During this half hour, sometime, I will try to get a better perspective of my life.
I will be unafraid, especially I will not be afraid to notice what is beautiful and to believe that as I give to the world, so the world will give to me. Amen. Amen. And we give that to all of our children. They all have one at their place. So when they have hard times, they say, did you read the just for today? And usually we feel better. Sometimes on that second one where I tell somebody something and I'm not supposed to, I have to do that over a couple times. So it's not just the even thing. So I think our listeners can already tell why I've invited you here.
You are a testament to doing the hard work and to living your best lives possible despite the curveballs that get thrown your way. And I think it's because of that that you are this exemplary example of what's possible with the Bredesen Protocol. And I'm excited and delighted to share, have you share your own story here on this platform. So, Jerry, Nancy, would you mind just starting with the story of Jerry's diagnosis? So about two years ago, we had been going to Mayo Clinic. We're from Rochester and Mayo Clinic is our home.
Everyone has a story about Mayo Clinic and saving lives. And so we've always had that trust, that backbone. We talked with Jerry's family med doctor just because he was having some issues with memory. And each time we would talk with him, he would just do simple things like, where are you? you know, do you know the day and do you know who the president is? And then basically we got blown off. I went back and I looked at emails and they were as far back as 2019 when we questioned this. But Jerry's true diagnosis came in July 2023. So for four years we had wandered and we were told, no problem, you know, don't worry about it.
So then our youngest daughter was getting married in August and they did a brain scan on Jerry and it came back with an Alzheimer's diagnosis. And that would have been one month before her wedding. Well, and then on top of that, I fell 10 times in one day. And I'm trying to figure out what's going on. And so I just kind of shook it off that my shoes are too big or that I was stumbling on them. And so that led to more of my not being able to find keys and not be able to actually remember the arm walking in the door.
Jerry's Alzheimer's Diagnosis Journey 7:10
Now since that time, that's all kind of come back and it's all doing well thanks to your programs. And now I can remember almost everything. Some of the stuff I don't wanna remember anymore, but that's normal. But anyway, so we went there and when we got the doctor, they did all the x-rays and all that stuff. And so we never thought that they were gonna tell me I had dementia. And they said, yes, you have what, stage three or stage one or what? I don't even remember what stage. What Jerry had ended up doing is all of the diagnostic testing, anything that the hospital recommended.
He did the spinal tap, the brain scans, anything that they recommended, he went through. And so we had had at least three doctors that had said he had mild cognitive impairment. They were very specific in locating the area in his brain that was affected. And so we knew there were three areas in his brain. First was the large motor skill, and that made sense because he was falling a lot. We thought that it had to do with his vision, with depth perception. But the second area in his brain that was affected was his vision.
And he would buy prescription glasses, not only through the hospital and through different companies here. I got 25 new here. And, you know, one day this one worked and then another, you know, so it made so much sense that his vision. And then the third area in his brain that was affected was short-term memory. So forgetting little words or, you know, trying to remember the name of a town and you can describe everything, but you can't come up with that name. It's like right at the tip of your tongue.
And so that's what they had diagnosed Jerry with. Yep. And the doctor got up and we did all these tests and that. And so we sat down and he says, okay, I'll see you next year. I thought, what do you mean next year? I'm dying, you know, because that's what I thought. I thought, well, heck, dementia means I'm dead. And so we went ahead and we, and emotionally it was strong on us, but we, you know, we went ahead. Said, okay, and we kinda, I thought, what do you mean? Goodbye, I'll see you next year.
You know, it was almost like it took the wind out of us. And then we went and we started to talk to the kids and they were, they thought the same thing. And then finally me and Nancy were talking and we said, after we went through about a month or two or three, I think, maybe, well, right before when we met you, we left there and, I thought, you know, we'd talk to him all about it. And me and Nancy said, Nancy, you know, we never give up on anything. I said, I love you. She says, you love me. And I think if you don't have that in your relationship, I think no matter what you try, you ain't gonna probably make it.
I shouldn't say that, but it's, but when you love each other, you know, and you really do, then you love each other for, So our first neurologist, she had told us to get our life together. Go home, update your will, update your trust. You need to wrap up all of these loose ends. And so she told us, get your life together. And then she had said that there's a treatment out there called lacanumab that Jerry would be a perfect candidate for. And so that was like our carrot. That was our hope. And then Jerry was going to do the lacanumab.
We were all set for it. And then they came back and they said, we did DNA genome testing and there is a medical contradiction. We can't move ahead. So our earth was rocked again. We were shattered because that, when she explained it, that was the hope. And it was like, that was the light at the end of our tunnel. So then we were like, okay, we'll go anywhere. We looked at places in Australia, places in London, we'll go wherever we need to go to get the best possible medical treatment. We are going to fight this.
And so then the next step was we did a trial through Mayo called the START trial. And that was C1812. We were three months into that trial. And then out of the blue, they contacted us and said, um, we need to retake blood tests. So we went through all of that numerous times, like for three weeks, they were drawing blood and wondering if they were drawing it incorrectly or what's going on here. So then they, they came back, they sat us down and they said, we have to dismiss you from the trial because of your blood.
I'm red blood. But anyway, so then we just sat down and we said, well, You know, we don't step back on me. We try to be nice to everybody and do the right things. But in this case, let's just put that aside. And I want a three day reprieve of dementia. I don't want you to talk about dementia. I don't want to listen to it for the next three days. Because we were starting to feel ourselves get angry at each other. That's really what was starting to happen. And so we prayed, and I got my other little part here that I should read.
It was on my card that I tell, Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace. Where there is hatred, let me sow love. Where there is injury, pardon. Where there is doubt, faith. where it is despair, where it is despair, hope, where there is darkness, light, and where there is sadness, joy. O Divine Master Grant, and I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console, to be understood as to understand, to be loved as to love, and for it is in giving that we receive. It is in pardoning that we are pardoned, And it is in dying that we are born to eternal life.
So that's what we got back on our hands. And you're the hope. You are the hope. We're the first hope, yeah. So what's crazy is I had sent a message to a girlfriend, her father had passed, and she responded back to me, I want you to check out this clinic. And so it was really for my allergies. So I checked out this clinic in Rochester, and it was called Wellness on Wednesday. And I have the date, March 20th, 2024. And they said, you aren't going to believe this, but the allergy one just passed. But next week, we're going to be talking about the Bredesen approach.
And I said, this is when our faith, is is huge and it gives you goosebumps because I said the Dale Bredesen approach and they said yeah and I said shut the front door I am reading his book and it's like if you look at all of I have highlighted everything and you know triple underlined and it was like this is the answer And so we went to a Wellness on Wednesday class, and that is how the whole Bredesen approach. The door was fully opened, and then that doctor had issues with her parents, and so had to stop being our doctor.
Finding Hope Through the Bredesen Approach 15:30
And so that's when we hooked into recode and the Apollo Health. And that's when we found you and your book. And it's like, we just really believe that God puts people on our path for a reason and that all of those doors that Mayo kept closing on us, it was for a reason. It was for a reason. Going through it was no fun, but coming through it, it's amazing when we look back. And we had a lot of tragedies right before that, when our son fell off an 85-foot cliff. He was pronounced dead. And that day, when we were in this high-raised mountain, that they happened to have a All of the ambulances.
All the ambulances, yeah. They never went on this hill as high as it was and they'd never done a test like this. So here's these three things testing them. Our son, they can't find him because he was stuck, fell off this 45 feet into the tree branch that went through him. And then all of a sudden they got those there well. And then he went 40 more, so. And they went 40 more and the 40 more, the more he was They were dead, they said, the one rescuer, he said, I got this, I got this. And he went up and then he went looking, he got it, he found it.
Mm-hmm. Pretty amazing. He ended up tracking our son on the trail, and he breathed for him. He hand-pumped, breathed for him for 45 minutes. And I think about that, like, when I'm exercising, you know, and it's like, I can't do this. And it's like, he kept thinking of his son, and he kept pressing the bag, pressing the bag, 45 minutes. And they had to jury-rig ropes and clothes off the highway, and then they were able to reach him, and then they had to bring him slowly off from the hillside. So yeah, we've had to deal with traumatic brain injuries.
They've had to get your family together. He will not make it overnight. He can't go back to Rochester. This was in La Crosse. He can't go back to Rochester because if we fly him there, he'll die anyway. And anyway, long story short, He was supposed to be in the hospital forever. He recuperates within four weeks. He's out. He's in the hospital. When I came up to see him, we went. to see him out there. We slept on the floor for four days or five days. And anyway, so we've had that miracle happen. And usually it was one of ours, her mother or my grandmother.
My grandmother raised me and I could hear all over me, don't give up. So anyway, how did I get into that? And getting through people's worst nightmares, right? Using your child to die with Alzheimer's. Oh yeah. And yet here you are returning to your faith, returning to your love for each other, your love for your family and laughing, having a good time. Yeah. What's growing old if you don't enjoy parts of it? We're going to get hit with these tragedies throughout life. So what do you choose to come back to?
Is it the anger and frustration and the why me or the gratitude and the love and joy? just exemplary in regard. You guys face these closed doors, these repeated closed doors at Mayo thinking, okay, we're here doing the best medical care possible and there are these brand new drugs that you get your hopes up and then they're let down, get your hopes down. and sort of guided towards this path of revisiting the Bredesen Protocol. And that was how you ended up in our 12-week coaching program. Right, and it was wonderful.
It is wonderful still. We really enjoyed it. Everyone, a little bit more about it, because it's hard work, right? It's not as easy as getting an injury or taking a pill. Yeah. I mean, you guys, obviously, you're not afraid of hard work. We know that. You will sleep on the floor to see how to deal with your child. You've built a successful business together. You've raised kids. You are no stranger to hard work. What made you dig in and really embrace the program? And how did you do it? Because we knew it.
I listened to you. We knew that this is where we should be. And we talked about it and we went to it as if we had had a chance to eat cake all day. That's how good it was. And we continued to. But, you know, at first we had to get rid of sugar, we got rid of everything, you know, it seemed like anyway. But funny, our first doctor from Rochester, who was with the Bredesen program, she was like, don't worry about the ketosis, don't worry about that. And then when we joined your program, it was like, no, you need to worry about it.
And so for us, there are certain aha moments where we'll try something because I feel like we're in this together and we have experienced life. And so what Jerry has been subjected to, I've been subjected to. And I often wonder, like, I should probably get tested. Jerry has the APOE4 gene. We know that. We don't know if I have it or not, but I look at it like, everything that he is doing for brain health, brain stretch exercises, everything that he's doing that I need to do that, and our kids need to do that, and the grandkids need to do that.
And so, if anything, I look back and I feel guilty because we had three square meals a day, you know, when they were growing up, but they were not health food. And I look at that and that was a huge aha moment for both of us because we could both feel that we fought so much clearer once we went into ketosis. And at first Jerry's like, I'm not going to prick my finger. And I'm like, I'll prick my finger. And so then we both wore, and we still both wear the continuous glucose monitors. And just now he's like, well, why is yours so low?
And mine, and it's like, It's a learning curve. And I think that it's one of these things where it's practice. It's not perfect. A far cry. We are not doing the program perfectly. But if we fall off the horse, we're getting back into the saddle because we know that when we went into ketosis, when we are in ketosis, we can think clearly. Both of us can think clearly. When Jerry uses the steam room, You know, letting go of those toxins, it's huge. And there are certain days it's like, we don't have time.
You know, like, we're just so busy. And then we will notice in each other, you know, not the same energy level and the blank stares. And we have the thing, the halt, the hungry, angry, lonely, and tired. And so before, Jerry would have a lot of, I call them Alzheimer's stares, where it's like looking off into space And I might as well not even be talking to him because he's not picking up the pieces type thing. And honestly, this guy, like even reading the Just For Today, he really had stopped reading.
And so now he's the one, it's like, well, I prefer audio books. Well, get audio books. And it's like every time we turn around, we're in the car and let's turn on Dr. Sanderson, let's turn on Dr. Bredesen. We do these, you know, you're deep diving, you know, let's just enjoy the day. Let's enjoy each other. Yeah, right. And so are you able to enjoy the day when you can't have sugar? I think this is one of the... Oh yeah, we don't even... Yeah, we don't even miss it.
Implementing the Protocol at Home 24:10
I mean, there was some of the recipes that we got from you. And I think I'm still, I have trouble with bread. That's my problem. I sneak in bread, like for a hamburger, I use the bread, you know. And I've found some places online where they use different ingredients. And so the glucose, the continuous glucose monitor, it will still stay, you know, steady. The line is steady where I can live without bread. And so he eats the hamburger buns from a company online. We get it delivered and it's like, Hey, it works.
It's, it's all good. The problem is though, that now lately by my, it's going up. The numbers went up more than what it should. So. An insulin resistance number. We just had a blood test done. Jerry's A1C is starting to creep up just a little bit, but glucose and everything I think is really good. What did you think was the other big light that came on with the protocols and things that you used? The big light. Yeah, yeah. Jerry's got the V light over here. I got the V light. I didn't know what you meant.
We also got the red light. She's got to get every light there is. Now she's talking blue light and white light in the bedroom. I can't sleep. The white light's going on. Your V-light over there. Yeah, I know what it is. I wear that helmet. I'm amazed how that has brought me around so fast, memorizing, not stumbling through all my words, or not all of them. But I'm amazed at that. And it seems like everything's working and then but then there's some stuff that falls behind you know it seems and I gotta go back clean that up but I always had to do that with the baby's diapers.
But ironically the three areas that in Jerry's brain that were affected from all of the beginning brain scans And we had neuropsych exams also. But the three areas that were affected now, Jerry has not had a fall in almost two years. This July it will be two years, right? Diagnosis. And every now and then my left foot will drop, but that's only after I'm really tired. Yep. And then Glasses, the same eye doctor who did his exam before, retested his eyes. And he's like, wait a minute, I got to redo this.
He redid it the second time and he said, what? He's never had anybody's eyes get better, is what he told me. And I said, well, I've been taking this program and with reticence. And I said, it seems like I don't even use them really most of the time. I take them in and off only because I get tired. My eyes get tired sometimes. But Jerry just had his driver's license renewed. I mean, he's still driving and doing all of that good stuff. But he didn't need his driver's license, his glasses. He no longer needs them.
And that's been like forever. And so we have not had a fall in almost two years. The vision has improved, documented. And then the third thing is short-term memory. And it's like, we keep asking, when do we get to retest? I want to know. It's not a bad thing. We look at it as a good thing. And Jerry had another neuropsych review through mail, and it came back better about maybe four months ago. And we have a social worker and the social worker said it was probably because you went in relaxed and that you knew what they were going to be asking.
And it's like, I didn't know it. All right. You know, you, you can believe what you, what you need to believe, but we've experienced it and it works. It works. Thanks for that pink stuff you gave us. Relax, Mac. Relax, Mac. Thanks for that. I'm so relaxed on that. I go an extra hour a day in bed still. Don't you think you had that back when you found out about the kids? Yeah. Yeah, with the kids. Well, that's incredible. Hello, everyone. I tell you the story of that. Me and my wife were getting ready.
We're now getting towards senior citizens. And we thought, well, we're going to go on a cruise. And so she went in, she said, but the doctor wanted to talk to her because she'd come up with some, she had to have some checks for blood tests. And so he asked her to come in. So I dropped her off because it's busy there. And I said, call me when you want me to pick you up. And I went away. The doctor says you need to come up to the clinic. We've got to show you something. I thought, oh, no, something went wrong with my wife.
I mean, I thought, oh, just, you know, it's just when we were going to go do stuff, we didn't have to take the kids all the time and that. So I got there and... Did that work for your kids then? They weren't born yet. But you had three older kids. Yeah, we had three older kids. Oh, were they? They were, they were in their, what, 16? Not when the kids were born. No, that's true. Let me do the math. I think they were 15 or 16 or 17. I don't know. They were good kids. And I have 30. You have 30 years?
Yeah. Difference in between there? Yeah. Yeah, 30 years difference. So we were getting up there. And I thought, well, heck, now we'll go take that cruise or this or that. We did take a world cruise, but that was before this happened. And so I get in there and I think it was a nurse told me, not the doctor. The doctor said, sit down. Or the nurse said, sit down. The doctor's coming. And then he came in and he said, I figured, oh, no, she's got cancer or something. You know, some reason hearing this is terrible.
I was more worried about her then. And he says, your wife's pregnant. And I said, you got to be shitting me. That's exactly what I said. I said, we're getting ready to travel. And I said, this just popped out of me. So every time I ever go up there to see Nancy or anything, they say, here he comes. And then they gave me the little round around, but it was fun. And we ended up not having one new child, not two, we ended up with three. So now we got triplets and we're trying to figure that out, you know, how we're going to handle all that.
And they're just wonderful. They came along and I think we enjoyed them without telling the older kids much, much more than that. You know, no, no, no. Yeah, right. And they grew right along and we loved them and we still do now. And now one of those triplet kids just had a baby and just recently They're in their 30s now, but just had a baby and my wife can't do anything but tell her how good that baby is. I do, I do. I take the phone, you know, like at the grocery store when she sends me pictures, I'm like, oh, isn't she adorable?
But she should be the Gerber baby. Yeah. So we're loving it. We are loving it. But I think that Jerry has improved so greatly over the last, like, 22 months. He's talking about doing another development and getting back into work and all of this, and I'm like... I turned 81 the other day. My gosh. So it's like, oh, come on, you know, like it's really time to retire now. And that's when we look back at all of this diagnosis. I had run a company and I had to leave abruptly and two of our boys then they took the reins over and I look back and I think I never would have left them.
because they're my kids and I loved hanging out with them all day at work and I didn't know if they had the ability to actually take the reins and they have proven time and time and time again that they do have that ability and that this is where I need to be here and hanging out with Daddy-O because life is short. We can't hang out all the time. I know, I know. We got a house where it's about a foot long, and I go about 100 feet long, and I go to one half of it, and she goes the other half, and then we can work together.
Thank God, like during COVID, you know, it's like you go to one wing, and I'll hang out near it. Yeah, I said, I'll do it, I'll handle it. Then we come together and eat and talk and do whatever the things are, but life's good, you know? I really can't complain, you know. Our kids are good. I mean, they've got problems too, like everybody does. But they stick with our readings, stick with it. And I send them a little reading every night we pray together. My dog now has learned when we start our father.
Tracking Progress and Health Improvements 34:10
She gets up and comes over and gets in the room. So we have that dog, she wants to go to the bathroom usually, I say. And I give her a treat then, too. Anyway, I'm babbling along, but you know, life is good. You know, it really is. And your program works. It works. And it's like, you know, if we can just shed the light, you know, and share the goodness to just if it reaches one person, it's worth it because it really, it really works when you work it. Yeah, and here's the deal. The kids say, we say, now, you guys got to try to get into this.
They say, oh, we can't give up sugar. I says, yeah, you can. I do it. And they say, no, we can't give up sugar. And then so I watched them gain 50 pounds, one of them. And I said, well, you got to eat that. Not really. They aren't that much. You know, and then my own son, his wife, she wants a baby and she eats sugar all the time, but I can't talk too much about that. But I say, well, you know, so we'll see what happens. But I'm trying to get him to at least take a shot at it, you know. You're certainly leading by example.
Yeah, exactly. If you guys were to think back to that month before your daughter's wedding when you found out that there really was something going on. Yeah. What would you tell yourself? What do you wish that you had maybe done different or learned earlier? Is there anything that really stands out? You know, I know this path. I think what I want to do is for people who are out there kind of in that position where you were that month before your daughter's wedding, what do you wish you had known?
Well, the program, naturally, your program, it'd be natural to have got all this information that's all around us now as we listen and podcast. We have podcasts. just you and the other doctors that are fighting this thing with the old time doctors. Seems like they don't want to even bother it. That's just, that's it. You know, go and get your will put together, you know, and whatever it was, they would say, and see you next year, you know. And so that part I'd want to have better. I guess I'd like to say, take it easy.
You know, take it easy. Don't like when we first, like I said, we started to get mad at each other. We very seldom ever get mad. We do, you know, you can't be happy all the time. So there's something that either I left a mess in the kitchen or something. And our advisor, she was bickering at me too much, but that's all, you know, that's part of it. That's only about 1%. All the rest of it's pretty good. So, you know, that learning together, doing this together and not having to fight your spouse or not having to.
be, have one of them be nervous all the time or one of them over like, I was there when we were going through this at the beginning here. I was afraid to even talk because I thought, my gosh, she's going to come up with some other thing and be concerned for me. But I still was, didn't want to talk because if I talked and didn't know the name right away. She's going to say, what, what, what? You say, oh, I wasn't talking about that. Does that go away? You know, you do it a little bit like that. Now, I still do that once in a while, but I don't want to be an invalid, you know, which you're getting afraid of.
You don't want to do this, you don't want to do that, but thank God there's people like yourselves that have stepped out now. And this is just huge if you've worked at the program, if you but don't work it your way, work it your way, you know? I think if somebody would have been able to tell me everything's gonna be okay, everything's gonna be all right, because you don't know. You're right. Yeah, you just need all the things if, you know. I mean, we were checking out assisted living and getting, you know, companies, everything in order, and it came like really fast.
And no one was able to say, like, this would be the progression, you know, like, and so I felt like I needed to do everything today and I should have had it done yesterday. And so if someone would have been able to say, there's hope, you know, there's light. That's what we said. Yeah. Yeah. We always say hope. Yeah. We can't. Yeah. Everything's going to be all right. Yeah. Sit around and not do something. And when that day comes, that'll probably, you know, still be probably trying to get out of the place.
Who knows? Who knows? I mean, but as it goes now, I feel that we're, from my standpoint, and Nancy, you can too, but from my standpoint, I really feel like we came back a long ways. But it kind of can get scary at times, nothing big, but when it starts regressing back and then it comes back, back and forth, then I say, well, who's eating at McBrane now? No, I didn't say that. Or if we have bad nights, bad sleeping nights. It's like sleep is so important and no one had ever told us that sleep is so important.
And so we have apps that we're able to look at to say, yeah, I had a good night's sleep last night. And a lot of times I need to first ask myself, how was your night before I look at the app so I'm not influenced. But it's like those were some nights we just don't get the right amount of sleep. So then it's like you make the decision, I'm not going to jump into revising the wills today, where it's like you're not always going to be at 100 percent. But you know what, when I was 40, I wasn't at 100 percent.
When I was 60, I wasn't at. So to accept that, yeah, we always say, mama said there'd be days like this, mama said. And then you look at that and address it. And for me, the caretaker, It's like, it's okay. It's okay to take a nap. It's okay to go eat. It's okay to walk away. It's okay to go out in nature. It's okay. And I think that's what I needed to hear. It's okay. Live in today. That's right. You use a tool called HALT, you mentioned, the H-A-L-T. Would you give an example of one of the ways that you each use that?
Well, usually Nancy uses it on me, because she says, you need ATA, you know. And I say, yeah. I think it's just, those things are grained from programs I've been in. Being a recovering alcoholic, 50 years I've been, no, not drinking at all. Is that some of their programs are very big, very good to help me. And then, That just stuck with me. So when I got into these problems, there is a way to get out of them. I mean, maybe not something that's a miracle, but just there is a way to get your mindset different.
I don't read much. I haven't read only one book in my life, been her, but I do listen to tapes and I've listened, I'm one of them. So, yeah, hungry, angry, lonely and tired. Any of those we both can tell from each other is already, because if she is teed off at me or having a problem or I'm having a problem, she usually knows and I usually know. She says, you need a nap? I said, no, or something like that.
Lessons Learned, Support, and Hope 42:30
And you've heard of the word hangry, you know? And it's like, I think in our society, when I do go into work, it's like, you can push through breakfast, you can push through lunch, you can do it. And it's like, now I realize I really can't because I am not the best version of me when I go hungry. And just like when I'm tired, do I get cranky? I need a nap. I know that. And it's okay for me to say, you know what, I need a nap. I think another thing is just love each other in a way that, not that you walk around, I love you honey, I love you honey, no.
I just, just, you know, we know when each other's on us and good and how everything is going good. And most of the time, since we got away from early dementia from the clinic and that and work in the programs, we are on 90% to 99. I mean, we just aren't, we both kind of know and we both kind of work in the same program is very important. I'd hate to bring somebody else in on it because they probably couldn't conversation with us. And I think there's a myth out there about this, I don't know if you want to call it recovery, but our program, our protocol, it doesn't have to be expensive.
A lot of it, and like I say, I use it at my age, the kids, the breathing techniques where it's like that doesn't cost anything to breathe. It doesn't cost anything to walk in, go outside and take a walk. These things where it's like where I can see a huge difference in myself, It's not a big expenditure. Yeah, and I think it's important that sometimes you feel like they're just waiting for you to kick over, you know, the people around you to say, I'm not going yet. And I got to watch the three ducks that just flew in back there.
I think they left the eggs back there. They're on our pool area. But anyway, it's, uh, It's just great. It's great because we both know what's going on. If you've got to have the husband and wife but they live together, you know, if they're together and they're in love or whether they're in love or not, I don't know. We are, that's all I can say. And we, don't you think so? Yeah, but I think it can work with any support, like a daughter, a mother, a father, a friend. It doesn't have to be a spouse.
Right, right. But with that going on, it makes it much easier. Oh, yeah. You know, we went through the hard stuff. So that, you know, it's the program itself, the reading, and like I say, audiobooks, but it's great. Matter of fact, I had Dr. Berdison on the iPod here. Yeah, just minutes ago. Minutes ago. And I was in the steam room, actually. I said, well, I'm tired of singing country-western Christian songs, because I'm a country-western guy, so I like the one where God says, why me, Lord? And I listen to Joyce Meyers sometimes and those guys, Joel Olsteen and some of them.
I figure God's with me all day. I can't go to churches because He's been with me all day, but I do both sometimes. You folks have life to live. You've got to attend at kids and grandkids to adore and enjoy. And it seems as if this turnaround in your health for both of you, really, it's allowed you to enjoy all of that more. It's created more capacity, even though you've got to put time into it each day. Oh, yeah. In the past on the chocolate cake. The whole point of growing old is to enjoy it and to be there with the people that you love.
There's more capacity for that these days compared to a couple of years ago. I ask everyone, I think that we cannot guess, but I'm curious, what brings you the most joy at this stage? Together, I think, for us. I think being together, it's really, that's the most joy for us. And then the kids, they're all busy. You know, they're on their way up to go do the things that they are. But we love being together. I have a sister who always says, how can you guys hang out all of the time? All of the time.
And it's like, we like each other. Yeah. You know, so like even if you want to go rummage sailing or, you know, pick anything, it's like, that's who I want to be with. You know, so, yeah. The first time you get a little up in here, I do it you, and then they say, hmm, I knew it. You know, it ain't going to make it. You know, so you got the naysayers. In life. I don't know, that's where we are. You know, we'd rather be together. No matter what it is. I mean, we get a part, Nancy goes and does her stuff and I do mine.
I think as a whole, we have no problem with telling somebody we're in love with each other because a lot of people don't want to tell people that. It's probably they either had a fight the night before or something. We do that. We get that once in a while. get up on our high horse. So that's what I think is the best thing. And then our kids are good, but they can be trouble. Just wait. They've got more, even our daughter, who's just our youngest daughter, she was telling us the other day what the I can't take it.
The baby was having trouble, what did she get? I said, we had three of them when you guys were running around. That's different, she said. Yep, sleep deprivation. I'm going to go help her for a while. Yeah, I know where she's going. And that's something else like that, you know, where before I wouldn't feel comfortable leaving Jerry for a long period of time, where now I feel like, oh yeah, you know, he's fine on his own. It's good. And that's part of it, too. I was getting kind of angry. I didn't need you to always be hanging out around me.
I mean, really, it was when we got more into dementia. And I didn't need you. What you say? Or how do you spell that? I don't need that. We have a lot of cameras in our house. and I would call Jerry from work, and he would hit my phone off, and I would be on the camera saying, excuse me, buddy, yeah, I saw that, you know. So yeah, he felt like he was under a microscope, and he no longer has to watch all of it. I used to unplug the cameras. Yep, he'd unplug the cameras. But I don't need it. No, you don't need it.
I'm busy at work, and I don't know, what am I going to do? You guys are an inspiration. I've learned so much. I've laughed so much. And I know that so many people are going to enjoy, not only enjoy listening to this, but they're going to have hope and they're going to get outcomes. They're going to feel inspired to do the work it takes so that their brain function can be optimized, just like yours. Thank you for sharing your vulnerability, your humanity. None of us are perfect. None of us are doing it perfect.
The program is asking a lot, but you can get the benefit and still be human. You guys, again, you're just the poster children for this program. I couldn't be more grateful for the generosity of your time and just being willing to share your story. Well, we are so grateful for you and you shining your light and the awareness and the hope. Thank you. Thanks for giving us life back. Anyway, it's great. Well, thank you, Dr. Sanderson. We greatly appreciate it. We can't tell your kids about it. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, They say, like Mortimer and those guys, and you go, hey, how are you?
Well, now the kids run around, the great-grandchildren run around. They want to see them now. Let me see that in that box there. I whip that up, and they, ah! They all go around, and I say, that's Mortimer. They're doing good. What fun. What fun. Yeah. Yeah. Much a privilege to know you guys. Thank you, Jerry and Nancy. Thank you so much. Thank you. And we'll be watching you. Thank you so much for listening to the Think Well, Age Well podcast. If you enjoyed today's conversation, please take a moment to subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with someone you care about.
It's one of the best ways to help others discover tools and inspiration for aging well. To stay connected, get bonus resources, and never miss an episode, head over to drheathersanderson.com and join my email list. Until next time, keep thinking well and aging on purpose. Thank you for tuning into Dr. Talks. We hope today's episode has enlightened and inspired you on your path to optimal health. Each day is a new opportunity to make choices that empower your well-being. For more insights and strategies, subscribe to our podcast and visit our website, www.doctortalks.com.
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