Full Transcript Introduction and Dr. Patelu2019s background 0:00 Welcome to Energize and Revitalize with Dr. 0:02 Amy. 0:03 I'm Dr Amy Cooper-Smith, a doctor prepared nurse practitioner, and this show is about empowering you to live a radiant, healthy and balanced life. 0:17 Dr. 0:18 Patel has worked as a licensed practicing psychiatrist for over 25 years and is the author of Us Unhinged 1 and 2 and US Fractured. 0:29 So welcome. 0:30 I really want to thank you for being here today. 0:32 Thank you so much, Amy, for inviting me. 0:36 Your journey started in India or your family's journey. 0:40 How did you come from where you grew up to be a psychiatrist in the United States? 0:46 Interesting journey. 0:47 My parents were born in India when England and the UK was still, India was in British colony and so they were British citizens. 1:02 And so British students could move to any of the other British colonies. 1:07 So they moved over to Kenya where I was born. 1:10 Then my father was the Minister of Finance and he ended up in Zambia and then I ended going to England as a British citizen for further education. 1:19 So that's where I went to medical school. 1:21 I registered as physician in England. 1:24 And then my parents wanted to come to this land of opportunity. 1:28 Let's face it, United States is a whole country of immigrants. 1:35 Everybody wants to have a better life. 1:37 That's what my father wanted. 1:39 And I could practice as a physician in this country if I worked hard and spend a lot of hours building a practice, doing as well as I can to get where 1:51 I couldn't. 1:52 In England, it's still a very pyramidal system. 1:54 And so the doctors at the top are very few, and so you really have to work a lot on the underside as far as senior house officers, 2:05 registrars, before you can ever become a consultant. 2:07 Here in this country, you become specialist and then open up your own practice and be a consult right from get-go. 2:14 So I and my husband, who was a neurologist, moved over when we finished our training And then both of us needed residencies and my husband got into residency 2:28 in neurology in Augusta, Georgia. 2:30 I could get into psychiatry residency and that's what we did. 2:34 And we had private practice. 2:37 And we both were very big fish in a very small bowl in North Florida, South Georgia area. 2:46 Very, very busy practices. 2:48 And it was my niche. 2:51 I loved child psychiatry. 2:53 Right from the get go, I wanted to be a pediatrician, but that kind of, during my training, it all baby clinics, crying immunizations, 3:07 dealing with parents who are always very worried and I just couldn't handle that. 3:11 So I had a training session in child psychiatry and just fell in love and never regretted my decision and enjoyed my work for 25 years. 3:23 Wonderful. 3:24 I lived in that part of Georgia for about four years, I was in the army. 3:28 Oh, three years? 3:30 So, so I live in Fort Stewart. 3:33 My husband actually worked in Valdosta for Oh, okay, great. 3:36 A little while. 3:38 So we moved down here to Florida, as did you. 3:40 Well, my parents got frail. 3:43 And so my partner decided to move down to take care of parents after I retired. 3:51 Yes. 3:52 Many of my clients here have a similar story that their parents came here first and then they followed, but now they're Floridians. 4:01 Florideans, right. 4:04 So I have the opportunity to look at a couple of your books to read some excerpts. 4:09 And you talk about a lot of really amazing topics.
How news headlines affect mental health 4:12 But one thing that really struck me was the news headlines and how it affects our mental wellness. 4:19 Right. 4:21 Well, you know, any kind of negative news or sensationalized news gets the most attention. 4:29 And so that's what the news outlets focus on. 4:33 So what does it do to our psyche? 4:34 You know there has been such an uptick in depression, anxiety, loneliness, because of all the issues that come up with You're constantly bombarded with 4:47 negative news. 4:47 So what happens? 4:48 We feel hopeless, we feel helpless, We can't do anything about it. 4:53 Everything is doom and gloom. 4:55 And until and unless you have a really strong foundation where you can really think about these issues in a more realistic manner, 5:03 then only you're going to be able to put aside. 5:07 Let's face it, even all of us who have a good mental health status still get despondent when we hear constant negative news. 5:20 issues that come up that are going to affect us health-wise. 5:24 And so, you know, your heart rate goes up, You have irritable bowel syndrome, and you feel sick. 5:30 You don't cope. 5:31 you tend to isolate because you don t want to meet up with people that re constantly talking about these kind of issues. 5:38 Especially if you're in conflict. 5:41 Let's face it, half the country is for one side and the other half of the countries for the And the animosity and the anger that all this has generated 5:55 over the last year has been very worrisome. 5:57 Let's put it that way. 5:59 I feel like it almost seems that it's intentionally polarizing when I see the headlines and I think, you know, do they want us to be fighting with each other? 6:11 And, I try to encourage even, if I have someone, even if we don't agree, that's okay. 6:16 We can talk about it or not, but it doesn't make you a bad person if you don' agree the way I agree. 6:24 You know, all of us have learned how to negotiate. 6:27 We have learnt to listen to each other. 6:30 Let's face it, there is no two people in a relationship that are going to agree to everything. 6:35 And as a team, approach to my practice, I believe that what's happening in the country right now is that the Republican and the Democrats are like two 6:47 parents and they're constantly fighting. 6:49 So what is happening to the children, which is all the citizens of America, they are all going to be upset seeing these constant fights all of the time. 6:57 And so we all have to learn to show respect, to get respect. 7:06 The politicians have to be better role models because what's happening right now is, like you say, they're causing so much anger and frustration and irritability 7:16 that that is really overflowing into what the citizens are feeling. 7:22 And then when the citizen are like the politicians are not listening and they're not doing what the American citizens want them to do. 7:31 And that's why in my last book, The U.S. 7:33 Fractured, I said, let's go back to the basic American values. 7:37 The Americans by heart are hardworking people. 7:41 They care about their communities. 7:43 they care, about the families. 7:48 Uh, doing volunteer work, you know, when we have a hurricane or we haven't been natural disaster, we don't stop to see what color they are or what nationality 7:58 they or, or whether they're legal or they illegal. 8:01 You know? 8:01 We're going to help people out. 8:03 Americans are very, very generous people. 8:05 I've been an immigrant in this country for 40 years, and I have really. 8:10 appreciated when I first came how encouraged I was with the hard work I did, the reception I got. 8:17 I never felt like I as a foreigner. 8:19 Never felt I like was Indian. 8:22 Always felt an American and I have always put myself forward as American first as most people do in this country. 8:30 And the divide that is happening right now is you're supposed to see color, you are supposed see what nationality you, are you supposed what language you speak. 8:42 But majority of immigrants have contributed tremendously to this country. 8:47 And that's what the politicians need to understand is look at your own roots where you come from. 8:54 It's a very interesting analogy to compare the politicians to parents. 9:01 Do you think that the conflict being caused is intentional or is it just an unfortunate side effect of behavior? 9:10 There is so much concentration right now on power, and then there's a big concentration in the corporations on greed. 9:19 So what they're doing is they are forgetting how to take care of people. 9:24 The politicians are so focused on I mean, you know, when the president of this great country says, I should win the Nobel Prize. 9:35 I shouldn't be given. 9:38 It's that sense of, that they deserve it. 9:44 And so that's how the politicians are ruling right now, is that, they deserved to be heard. 9:50 They deserve to the right people. 9:53 And sadly, the Democrats didn't do anything when they were in power. 9:59 They are slow to react, they're slow take action. 10:03 And on the other hand, we have somebody who is like a bulldoze going through the Constitution. 10:12 sadly breaking a lot of the rules. 10:15 And let's face it as, again, as an analogy, I talk about being good role models. 10:22 The thing that the children learn from is watching parents. 10:28 They do not learn by listening to parents, they learn watching the parents how are they reacting? 10:35 What are the saying? 10:36 How are supposed to behave? 10:38 And sadly, that's what the two fractions with the citizens is happening, is that each party is really kind of modeling on what politicians are modeling. 10:52 Right. 10:52 So I think that is our reality right now. 10:55 But how can we, the citizen, respond to that so that we are not getting sick both mentally and physically? 11:03 Well, you know, one of the things I always say is you have to limit to what you're listening to. 11:08 So don't get overwhelmed. 11:11 Do not ever open your phone or laptop first thing in the morning or last thing at night, because you don't want to start off your day feeling anxious and 11:22 feeling angry and feelings hopeless. 11:24 You don' want end your days where it's going to disturb your sleep, you're going sit there worrying about all these things.
Staying informed without getting overwhelmed 11:31 Don't continually listen and doom scroll You know, basically what was said, what happened, you know? 11:39 What did they say now? 11:40 what did he do now. 11:42 Don't get away from that, because all that does is it increases your anxiety. 11:47 And when your inside increases, What are you going to do? 11:50 You're either going drink more, You going too smoke more. 11:53 You are going either, uh, withdraw and not talk to people. 12:00 So what I say is look at Just the headlines. 12:04 And then be choosy about what you want to read more about. 12:08 Don't read everything that's out there. 12:10 Because let's face it, the news outlets put out the new as fast as they can. 12:14 They don't fact check. 12:16 Any retractions are very small and maybe a few days later. 12:20 But the first thing they report, who is the fastest person out of the gate? 12:25 So the use are not always accurate. 12:28 So one of things is get two or three different sources that you believe in. 12:32 So that they're respectful. 12:34 Like, you know, BBC News are pretty much not involved. 12:38 And so they report pretty good news. 12:40 So choose two or three outlets that are good-news outlets and get the facts. 12:46 Learn to scroll through different headlines so that, like I said, read those in depth and then make up your own mind. 12:55 what you think is the truth and what is just sensationalized negative news. 13:01 The other thing that I always say is try and pick a few topics that you're passionate about. 13:09 To me, freedom for women is a very important aspect. 13:14 I think that, I was horrified as was the rest of the world as the freedoms that the women are losing in this country. 13:21 Men never have to lose any freedoms. 13:23 We are not going around doing vasectomies or we're not telling them to abstain. 13:28 It's always the women who, you know, can't have birth control pills. 13:31 You can have abortions. 13:33 you can do what your own body could dictate what you want to do. 13:39 And so that is a very passionate project for me, because having seen how much women have struggled all through the centuries, 13:47 and that's why my first book, The Us Unhinged, is all about women. 13:51 It's all About relationships. 13:52 it's All about improving how males and females can interact. 13:59 what women have had to overcome and how far we have come. 14:04 But now I feel like we're just being drawn backwards. 14:07 So pick a few topics that are important to you, write to your senators, right to house representatives, make your voice known, 14:16 talk to people who are organizing these meetings, who out rallying like the no king rallies, whatever you feel passionate about, 14:26 but do it in a respectful way Learn to listen to people on the opposite side and then make up your mind. 14:33 If you go in talking to, people being very defensive, People are not going to want to Listen to you. 14:38 So you have to start with yourself. 14:41 You have To start With what's going To ground you first before you can start making a change in the community. 14:48 And I think you have a good point about empowering yourself, because if you feel hopeless and helpless, I that's going to contribute to despair. 14:55 But if say, OK, this is what I can do. 14:57 I could write this letter and that control that we take. 15:01 Right. 15:02 Like AARP, you know, let's face it, almost 70. And so I belong to A.A.R.P. 15:10 and they're always putting out stuff for seniors. 15:12 So I'm always doing the surveys. 15:14 Always giving my input. 15:16 into what needs to change, what we are passionate about. 15:20 And so every generation has to decide on what is important for them. 15:27 What are the freedoms that they wanna fight for? 15:30 Freedom of speech is one that's being really squashed right now. 15:33 I would think that the young people should be out there in social media, full blast, dictating that this is what they want from Americans and their politicians. 15:45 Yep. 15:46 So we need to pause for a break from our sponsor, but we're going to come back to this because it's important. 15:51 Everyone don't go anywhere. 15:52 We'll be right back. 15:55 Welcome back to Energize and Revitalize with Dr. 15:58 Amy. 15:59 I'm Dr Amy Coopersmith and my guest today is Dr Shaila Patel. 16:03 Before the break, we were talking about the news, headlines, the polarization of our society, and what we can do to take control of how we respond to these 16:13 things by being choosy, limiting what you might choose to listen to or what might we choose watch. 16:20 And so you mentioned, you know, being choosy, maybe scroll the headlines. 16:25 One thing that I've struggled with as a consumer is that many of the headline seem rather inflammatory. 16:32 And even if I don't open, even If I press click, it's still affecting me. 16:36 I'm still having an emotional response to it. 16:38 So have you found that other people say that? 16:41 And what can we do? 16:42 Oh, absolutely. 16:43 Like I said, You know, that's what headlines are meant to be. 16:48 They're meant be hooks. 16:50 And what they do is they hook you in and they want you to read more. 16:55 Whether there's any substance to it or not, but that is what the meaning of the headline and the hook is. 17:02 Is they won't to get your attention. 17:03 The want to you get to that site. 17:08 their perspective. 17:09 And that is why I'm saying it's going to be very important for you to say, okay, you know, is this really, really important to me? 17:18 Is this what I really want to spend my precious time? 17:22 And when you limit, say you There's a good study, even if you have only been on the site and read negative news for 14 minutes, 17:34 it increases the depressive and anxiety symptoms. 17:37 Only 14 Minutes. 17:39 So limit yourself to maybe five minutes at a time and give yourself saying, OK, I'm just going to scan these headlines. 17:46 What's going on? 17:47 So I am aware of what's happening. 17:50 Don't bury your head in the sand and don't pretend like this isn't happening, because when that happens, and then people give up. 17:58 And that is why I do these radio shows. 18:01 This is where I speak out on the podcasts because I'm very passionate about people needing to be empowered. 18:09 America has so much to offer. 18:11 It has offered me so many in my life. 18:15 And I want everybody to have that advantage, to be able to, be empowered. 18:21 And the only way you empower yourself is through knowledge. 18:24 How do you get knowledge is reading and listening to the right sources.
Womenu2019s rights, family planning, and advocacy 18:30 Don't just, you know, sadly, the attention span of an American is very, very short. 18:36 So people just tend to spout back whatever they're hearing or they are listening. 18:41 They don't dwell into it. 18:44 And that's why, like I said, just pick two or three topics. 18:46 Just have a very limited time and then look at what's important to you. 18:52 you make such a good point about having knowledge. 18:55 And so I, at one point, felt really manipulated by the news and I said, I'm shutting it off. 19:01 I am not going to watch it. 19:02 It won't let them manipulate me. 19:04 But then I don't know what's going on. 19:07 Right. 19:07 That's very dangerous for all of us. 19:11 We can't do that. 19:12 So we do have to find that balance, figure out who can we trust? 19:16 And I still working on it, it's still very difficult. 19:21 But like I said, you know, once you get into a couple of sources that you believe in and you think that for the most part, 19:27 they are really reporting the right things, then you will automatically go to those sources and your automatically read a little bit more about what they 19:35 have to say. 19:36 And then they will always have other sources where they're getting their information from. 19:41 So when I was writing my books, that's how I ended up getting into all these different sources and different things. 19:47 Because when was I writing this, you know, all of my book are non-fictional. 19:52 Of course, I had to have every every little thing. 19:55 I mean, I have like over 600 footnotes in each book because basically I had to check out a lot of sources. 20:05 And I to make sure that what I was writing about was accurate. 20:10 Yeah, and that's important because you want people to be able to trust you and to back check yourself and be as accurate as you can. 20:17 Exactly. 20:18 Which I enjoyed what read and I think our listeners will too. 20:24 So you mentioned focusing on what you're passionate about, and you mention women's rights. 20:29 So has your experience by living in other countries and then seeing what's happening here, did your experienced from not being here originally influence 20:39 how you feel now? 20:40 Well, you know, I grew up in Africa. 20:42 And if you read a lot about how Africans treat their women, how even the mutilation that goes on. 20:51 I don't know if your aware, but even in certain tribes, they cut off the clitoris of the women because they don t want them to enjoy sex, 20:59 because the men are allowed to allowed to have sex for procreation and bearing children, and so they're not supposed to enjoy it. 21:09 So they can't go out and have affairs and, you know, be with other men or whatever. 21:14 And so growing up in that kind of culture and reading about that at a young age, affected me. 21:20 Growing up and in Indian culture, which really almost All of them want a son, and they always say that it's the son that's going to take care of the family. 21:34 Well, let me tell you that is not correct. 21:38 Now, I find in my experiences, it is the women and it the daughters that are always taking care the parents. 21:45 And a lot of parents are beginning to realize that. 21:48 I have a lots of my mother's friends who are saying, we always wish we had a daughter because she would definitely be taking of us. 21:54 But I grew up with that culture. 21:56 Even the serials my mother watches are all dictating where the women are downtrodden on. 22:03 They are not treated right. 22:04 And so it was a very, very personal issue for me to look at what women have struggled with and come through. 22:12 I mean, I came to this country. 22:14 It was so freeing. 22:17 that women could say whatever. 22:18 I don't always agree with the, I'm still very conservative Indian. 22:23 And so I didn't agree the way women go around dressed, half naked, you know, on the beach. 22:30 But we can if we want to. 22:32 That's exactly right. 22:33 And we have the freedoms to be able to do that. 22:36 But when I started, especially with this year, with all the limitations and the Supreme Court judges, instead of ruling what's right for the American people, 22:46 they're ruling more conservative and siding with the conservatives as to almost like Justice Thomas wanting to even take away the birth control pills. 22:57 I mean, how backward can you think about this country? 23:03 And what I cannot understand is why are women putting up with this? 23:07 Why are young women who have enjoyed so many freedoms in this county putting it up? 23:13 They should be shouting from rooftops saying this is not what Americans stand for. 23:20 I spent a good amount of my career working at the health department in our county and of course family planning is paramount for health and wellness. 23:29 Now I've even read about maybe even in Africa where there isn't access to family planting and what that does to infant mortality and maternal mortality 23:37 by not spacing those pregnancies properly. 23:40 and not even to talk about the economic impact of having children when you're not ready. 23:44 And you can't afford them. 23:46 That's right. 23:46 Right. 23:47 So yes, I agree that I never thought in my lifetime that i would see things happen this way. 23:54 But what's sad is the people with lower socioeconomic status are being affected more. 23:59 Because like you said, they're forced to have children they can't afford. 24:02 They can afford to get, you know, health care. 24:06 That they have to drive ridiculous amount of distances to be able to go to a state where they cannot have an abortion. 24:13 I mean, everything is just going crazy now. 24:17 You're absolutely right. 24:18 If a woman of means has a pregnancy that didn't that she didn't want to have, she could get herself someplace. 24:27 But a woman in a lower socioeconomic status wouldn't be able to do that.
Immigration, contribution, and closing advice 24:32 But so if we feel empowered about something like this, then we should figure out how we can help. 24:39 Right. 24:41 And like I said, main thing is that reaching out, trying to talk to your neighbors. 24:46 Like I say, first listening and try and organize things, try to reach out. 24:52 And we've talked about reaching out to your senators, reaching after your politicians, making sure that they understand as an American citizen, 25:03 you know, where your stance is. 25:05 And if enough people report this enough people reach out enough, people, you know, try and give their opinions as to how they feel about what's happening. 25:20 Maybe one day we may see some changes, but to just not do anything is not an answer. 25:27 You're right. 25:28 So also in the news right now, we have a lot of headlines about immigrants. 25:34 And as an immigrant, I was wondering about your opinion about things. 25:40 Well, you know, one, that I came into this country legally. 25:44 My father was an accountant and he got a green card on his profession. 25:49 I came over as a dependent on my parents, but I come over legally. 25:53 So I did not agree seeing thousands of people just coming across. 25:59 The Democrats really messed up there. 26:02 They should have definitely limited the number of the people that came across, they should come across legally, and they cannot just let anybody and everybody 26:12 come every American person agrees with. 26:15 But the way they are treating people so inhumanely right now is just ridiculous. 26:20 Because let's face it, our farmers rely on seasonal workers. 26:27 If you see who are the contractors, who the land people, they're all immigrants. 26:33 They are very, very hardworking people. 26:35 they add a lot to the American economy. 26:39 And then people think that they can just round these people up and send them back. 26:44 Are there that many Americans that are actually going to fill those positions? 26:48 No, I don't think so. 26:49 And especially when you look at white middle class people, they're all looking for corporate jobs. 26:55 They're looking. 26:55 For more blue collar jobs, there are not going. 26:59 To be doing the yard work, you're not. 27:01 Going to be. 27:02 Doing the construction, not gonna be building roads and to just keep bad-mouthing immigrants who are very hardworking people. 27:11 And if you look at the other end of the spectrum, let's look all the big CEOs. 27:18 Look at Google, look Pepsi. 27:20 Who are the CEOs? 27:22 They're all South Asian immigrants. 27:26 So at both extremes, the immigrants are really Contributing a ton of goodness to this country and to really down and bad mouth immigrants is intolerable 27:46 to a person like me. 27:47 Oh, I can definitely understand that. 27:50 And you really do a good job about presenting both sides, like one side screwed up initially, now the other side is making it worse. 27:58 So, so I hope that we do all start treating each other kindly. 28:03 But it starts with people like you speaking out. 28:05 Thank you. 28:07 So we're almost out of time, but if you were to leave our listeners with one thing they could do to maybe help navigate this dangerous space, 28:15 what would that be? 28:17 Okay, take care of yourself first of all. 28:19 Like I said, don't open the news first thing in the morning. 28:23 Get some good sleep. 28:24 Don't look at the new last thing at night. 28:27 move, dance, do whatever you need to go out in nature, you know, take some walks, get away from, stop looking at your phone. 28:37 You know we keep talking about all the impact of social media. 28:41 Limit your time on social. 28:44 That is so paramount, not only for your kids, but for yourself too. 28:48 Yes, well those are very wise words. 28:51 I really want to thank you for being here. 28:52 How can our listeners learn more about you and find your books? 28:56 It's really easy, it's www.drshilapatel.com. 29:06 So go to my website, they'll be able to get hold, and they're able read what my books are about. 29:13 Or they can just go on Amazon and put on the headline, books by Dr. 29:17 Sheila Patel MD. 29:19 All of the books will show up. 29:21 They'll give you information about what's in them. 29:26 Sadly, people are not reading as much, but there's lots of different good information in all of them that would help their mental health. 29:34 And that was the only reason I put them out, not to make money, because trust me, writing books does not make, money. 29:40 But I just felt passionate about giving out good, information and that's what they are about. 29:46 Wonderful. 29:47 All right. 29:48 Well, thanks again. 29:49 Thank you, Amy. 29:56 What insights did today's episode leave you with? 29:59 And are there more topics you want to hear about? 30:01 Send me an email to radiantpodcast2025 at gmail.com. 30:06 Check out past episodes on Amethyst Wellness YouTube. 30:10 And I'll be back next Saturday morning at 730 with more expert insights to help you live a radiant, healthy and balanced life. 30:18 Until then, here's to your best life!
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