The Ultimate Menopause Weight Loss Blueprint

Welcome and Guest Introduction 0:00

Hello. Hello. Welcome back to Mastering Your Meno(Pause) Transition 3.0. Our third year at it. I am your host, Dr. Sharon Stills. And it's such a pleasure, such a joy to be here with you all today. I have an amazing guest for you. New to this Summit, but probably not new to many of you because Dr. Jess is just a force to be reckoned with. And I remember first seeing some patients were asking me about Dr. Jess on Instagram, and I went and checked her out and I was like, wow, this this chick is cool.

And you know, she was an MD, a hospitalist, and now she has just, you know, left that world. And she's deeply ingrained in the world of, natural medicine and bio regulatory medicine. And our paths started crossing and now I, you know, I just love that I can call her a colleague, and she's actually a dear friend, and I adore her. And I'm so happy she's here. Today we are going to talk about an amazing topic, weight loss. because, you know, we were talking about what are we going to talk about? And I'm like, let's talk about weight loss.

Because she has a really powerful story and she has an interesting perspective of that. You probably won't hear anywhere else. And I'm like, you know, we're women. We all want to know about weight loss, right? So so welcome Dr. Jess. I am so happy to have you be a part of this Summit. That's probably the loveliest intro I've ever gotten. Thank you. Warms my heart so much. Honestly, though, thank you, Dr. Stills. I feel the same way about you. Share. And. Absolutely. So, you know, I love this topic and thank you for bringing this up, because when I think about the questions I get online or from my clients, it is about inflammation and weight loss, especially as we get older.

Inflammation, Weight Loss, and Feeling Safe 2:06

We I mean, myself, I struggled with this and I followed all the guidelines and rules, rules that were told to do, and it didn't really help me much. And when I listen to my audience, I hear them say something similar. I ate x amount of calories a day. I kept my macros. I take this many steps. My pedometer tells me, you know, I eat this many grams or protein or I try my best. But you know what helped me lose weight was not any of those things. Like, I always move my body and worked out and even weight training through most of it.

and so there was something different for me in my weight loss journey. So, so thanks for having me on. And thanks for, for talking about this, because I think it's going to help a lot of people out there. For a lot of women out there, I should say. Yeah, well, we never know. Sometimes where we're starting, we're like, come on, bring your men. The men need to hear this too, right? But yeah, and I have I have personally seen your you know, you look fabulous right now. And so, I'm excited for you to tell your story and share the medicine.

And, you know, because I think it can be applicable to a lot of the women who are looking because that is so true, especially in our menopausal time frame and journey. You know, we're doing all the right things and nothing is budging. And it can be very frustrating. Yes. And first, I just want to start out by saying, when I got real with myself, I thought about what I tell people all the time, which is, you know, it's not just about hormones. And and as you can see in menopause, there's so many other things that happen.

Your moods change and your sleep changes, and there's so many other aspects besides just hormones that seem to be affected, although hormones indirectly can affect all that. So I always describe it as a stool with four legs. One of the legs is the liver, one of the legs is the sex hormones estrogen and progesterone and testosterone. One are the adrenal glands or mitochondria, where the, the cortisol is made inside the mitochondrial folds of the adrenal glands. And then, finally the thyroid. And so all of these can kind of like be a leg that kind of gets a little wobbly, needs to be screwed in just a little bit.

And one screwed in tighter affects all three other legs. Most of the time. And that was that was my case as well. And so for me, I kind of got hardwired in sort of a, unhealthy relationship. Well, not sort of. It just was unhealthy. And it happened so slowly and in city history that you really don't realize it until it's too late. And I'm sure that I'm speaking to a lot of women out there who maybe are in unhealthy dynamics, and you've just gotten used to it. And because, man, it it's better to be this than to be alone, right?

That's how a lot of us think. And guess what? I was stuck there and I was wrong. And I'll be the first to admit that was part of the problem was I couldn't feel safe in my body and in that relationship because there was a space for me that was ever held to feel safe. And, it always felt like walking on eggshells, waiting for the other shoe to drop. And until I left that unhealthy dynamic, I couldn't feel safe in the world and to be myself and to speak up if I had a problem and to not be, you know, maybe ridiculed or talked to poorly if I had a differing opinion.

And if this sounds like you, this is part of why your body might be inflamed for me. Think about it. I mean, why does your body get inflamed anyway? There's lots of root causes of inflammation, but one of them is if it feels unsafe or if there's constant low cortisol release all the time, it's sort of like, you know, there's a tiger lurking around the corner and you never know when it's going to pounce. Your body doesn't know the difference. If you feel unsafe in that situation versus if you're in an unhealthy dynamic with someone.

So I had to leave that dynamic to actually get that cortisol stop, you know, being peaked all day long. And for me to feel safe. And so that's something that a lot of people don't think about. I don't care what you're eating. It doesn't matter if you feel unsafe. Your body is going to be puffy. You're going to start to get that, you know, weight gain right around your midsection where none of us want it. I mean, that was me and and I, I the biggest thing I'm telling you right now is that you have to surround yourself with people who make you feel safe and allow you to be yourself and see.

Yeah, I, you know, as you were saying that and I wasn't really sure what you were going to say, but I, you know, I can totally relate. I, I was in one of those walking on eggshells relationships, and I've been single now. It's the longest I've been. I've been single for four years now. And I just kind of said, you know, okay, it's time to really open up and let someone back in. But I have really settled in and had to learn to be still safe in being single, because I think we've been taught, or at least I was taught, that, you know, it's not okay to be single like I had all these, you know, you're a loser if you're single.

Stress, B Vitamins, and Lab Markers 7:48

I had all these stories that I didn't matter if I was single, I wasn't enough. And now I'm like, I love being single. And I think it's from that place of feeling safety in it. Now I can open myself up. And so I think what you said, and it's not just about being safe in your, you know, significant other, but it can be with family members with colleagues. I had a patient the other day who, like I was like, I can prescribe all the things. But like my number one prescription is like, you need to find a new job.

Your boss. This is not a healthy, safe place for you. So I think what you just shared is, I'm sure a lot of us listening, especially as women, can relate to this in one way or another in a relationship we're in. So thank you for sharing. You know about your situation too. It's important to you know, I definitely had to run through those emotions of what it is to be single and what I realized is a lot of people settle, and the people who are single just aren't settling. And, and, and so that's okay.

And that's exactly maybe society is wrong a lot, which so far has been my personal experience. but you know. Someone I know the other day, said to me, you know, you need to change. You're like, what you're looking for. You need to settle a little or you're going to be alone for a long time. And I said, I'd rather be alone than settle. Because when I've settled in the past, I've been in what? You explain that walking on eggshells, not saying stressed out all the things and a dysregulated nervous system.

And I have a very regulated nervous system right now. And I'm like, if you're going to come be a part of my story, we're going to keep the nervous system regulated or you're not coming. I love it, I love it. Yes, girl. Yes. You're not. Yes. Well for the people in the back okay. So yes. And I just want to stress here, people think, oh, you're just stressed out. You have a dysregulated nervous system. What does that mean in context of health? And I'm just going to give you a personal example. For me, it doesn't mean every single person is just like me.

But I'll tell you what I know. So that way you know you can learn from my story and you can understand the body, hopefully a little bit from my story about why you gain weight too. So when I get stressed out, you know, I'm a warrior Gina type, which, you know, onto when I got my 23 and me, I know Mark knows how to kill me. I know, but this is before I knew better. So I got 23 on me instead of the top warrior Gina type. Which means that, I, I chew up neurotransmitters and things like norepinephrine epinephrine pretty quickly so I can, I never feel bad.

My body always protects me from feeling bad. and so if I'm going to have healing detox reaction, it's usually going to be anxiety or irritability or something like that. and I even if I get stressed out, my body doesn't even warn me. Really. So taking those that into account when when all this I was, was with this person for almost six years, this walking on eggshells relationship and eventually the stress strips me of things like my B vitamins and what stress does. You know, if you're really inflamed, you can't really absorb minerals and vitamins very well.

Your guts really inflamed. I've seen a lot of people not be able to absorb capsules, even have to open up capsules to get the absorption. And so for me, I had not didn't have a lot of symptoms and I was eating red meat and I still ended up with a B vitamin deficiency. And I mean a rip roaring B biting deficiency. You know, as doctors, we know that when you have a deficiency, you can see it in something like the blood work, like a CBC, the complete blood cell count. And, you know, my blood cells were all the wrong sizes and shapes because of this long standing vitamin deficiency, which, you know, when you don't have B vitamins, you can't make DNA synthesis, you can't make DNA, you can't, you know, regular weight and, form the the proper red blood cells, sizes and shapes and you can't carry hemoglobin properly.

Oxygenation to all the circulatory system. You can't really make neurotransmitters or hormones even you can't really detox. So, you know, if you can't detox and and the body is in kind of alarm mode, it's going to set off the inflammation cascade. And that stress is going to pile on top of each other and keep really stripping you of minerals and vitamins. So for me, my MCV was 108. Which is oh, because I freak out and people are like over 91 mean wow. And you know, I a lot of, you know, if you're listening to this because a lot of doctors won't even really pay attention to that.

So that's really important to look at your MCV and your CBC because it could be that high in a lot of doc. I've seen patients come in and their doctors like, oh yeah, that was nothing to worry about. Yeah. And I had it all over. You know, my my MPV was the wrong side in my C. My there was so many different abnormalities that were in the red. And you know, when I got my serum B12 it was normal in the six hundreds. But you know that didn't that showed that in the blood. My B12 was normal, but it wasn't being absorbed because of my inflammation.

So if they'd gotten a urine MMR, they probably would have seen different. But I'll tell you what the I was eating red meat, you guys. I wasn't absorbing anything. My vitamin D was really, really low too. And so the minute I started taking methylated B vitamins, I, it was like the world went from black and white to color. Wow. And, you know, the really the only symptom I had was neuropsychiatric symptoms. I was actually suicidal for a few months. And I just thought, is this what menopause is? Is this how I'm supposed to feel?

I mean, I hear people tell some horror stories. Sometimes I'm like, why am I one of those people feels this way? And now I know why. It was actually the situation and the lack of, vitamins that were causing me an inability to think straight and detox and lose weight as well. And when I figured all this out, you know, I immediately started taking B vitamins. And because of that, I created a product with methylated B vitamins and and vitamin C and Bluetooth II on. And I decided since I couldn't absorb it in a pill or anything else at that time, I was going to have people be able to hold it right here for 30s and absorb it 100%, because that's the kind of product I needed when I was in a situation like this.

And in the end, you know, the main things that I did was I kept my protein to one gram per pound, you know, which is about 130g per day for me. I made sure, I was moving my body every day and really weight training because, you know, as you get older and I'm in my 40s, you know, mid 40s now. So as you get older, you know, really what I've noticed is weights really are the only thing that really sculpts the body the fastest, and that the muscle is the organ of longevity. And you do really want to build muscle early because you can actually continue that on throughout old age with just that habit.

And, and it really is going to prevent early aging. It really is going to keep you young. It is going to prevent osteoporosis. There's so many different things that that we look for with weight training. So that was a big, huge ticket for me to and then really feeling safe and making sure I had I started out with, IVs and then making sure I had products that were easily absorbed for me, because what I want people to know is I didn't have, you know, I have the gene for me, for which a lot of people know about, but I didn't have it activated until I was in a stressful situation and it was epigenetic activated due to my environment, my situation.

I used to have great methylation, and now I don't. So that's a good point. So I just want to circle back because you you threw out urinary MMR. So I want everyone to know that's methyl malic acid. Did you also and I'm glad you brought up like the B-12 serum because I don't even bother running that. I think it's a very inaccurate level. And, you know, if you're taking B vitamins, it goes sky high, and I've seen patients come in and then they're like, oh, I was told I have to cut back on my B vitamins because I'm overdosing.

So but I love, you know, methyl Melnick acid. And like you mentioned, the mikveh, the Mk H. did you also have I'm curious, did you? Because I use homocysteine a lot.

Recovery, Protein, and Lifestyle Shifts 17:00

Did you have a elevated homocysteine in. So I will tell you the first round of labs. They didn't grab it, but I requested at the second round of labs, probably three months later. And three months later it was still 12. So, you know, that's for me. That's that lets me know what was going on. My CRP was also eight. Wow. yeah. What's it for you guys? It's a C-reactive protein. It's nonspecific, but it does indicate generalized inflammation. and so I've never had labs like that before in my life. so it lets you know how much stress can just elevate inflammatory markers in general.

and homocysteine, can you talk a little bit about and where you like to see it? Yeah, I really you know, every labs ranges are a little bit different, but I really like it below ten. And you know, even better if you can get below, you know, around eight or so for people, and again, mine was 12, three months down the road after I've been supplementing, you know, with I.V. vitamins for a while, too. So homocysteine is more of a marker for like cardiac function. They all say in general. but it goes really high if there is a B vitamin deficiency.

because B vitamins are used in so many different things, including methionine in the cycle to actually methylated is you need methylated B vitamins if you have for or if not, that process is bypassed. Let's say you're taking something like folic acid or cyano bomb and which aren't methylated. And that goes through the process of actually bypassing and creating inflammation and raising the homocysteine. And what about overdoing it on can you overdo methylated B vitamins. What what are the listeners need to know.

Yeah. You know I've heard re actually research reports which is interesting about B6 toxicity. and some nerve pain that is associated seizures and nerve pain that is associated with that. so yes, it is. You know, you do want to be cautious about how much you're taking. You don't want to take more than the recommended daily allowance, but it should be listed on the bottle. and definitely look for, you know, guys somewhere that's made with a GMP certified facility where they're doing third party testing as well.

So in your new product, which actually we were in Mexico together and you gave me a sample and they took it from me at the, at the, all right. So math was like magic. I that they're like, yes, we can. Because it's four ounces, I guess, and they need it less than 3.4 and oh man. Yeah, I'm going to take it. It's healthy for you. But what actually I'm curious. Like what did you put in the compounds. What is the formula. Absolutely. So we decided because of the situation I went through, I really wanted a product that I knew was easily absorbed in the vehicle tissue.

So, it's all methylated B vitamins, all the way through, you know, B1 to B12. And then we have, full folate as well. And then, vitamin C and glue defy on which is the master antioxidant in the body too. and you know, it's a liquid. So I always tell people iron tastes kind of like a fart. And B vitamins taste like heavy metals. So. So it was quite a feat to get it to taste like a, a smoky citrus flavor. and I guess some people love it. Some people hate it. I'm one of the people who loves it. And I think it's really good.

and I think we did a pretty good job covering up all those flavors with that without fillers or nasty, you know, adjuvants or anything like that. We do have some stevia in there. and all of the natural flavors are listed from lemon peels and citrus. So there's nothing in organic or not, you know, artificial or anything like that in it now. So basically you got safe, you repeated your B vitamins, you moved your body, and you ate a lot of protein. Could you we we hear this. We talk about protein all the time.

But could you just say what. Because, you know, 130g of protein a day is is no small feat. So could you just give us some practical ideas on how women can meet those protein goals? Yeah, there's actually a company called yoked, which is pretty good that you can get your eggs from that gets gets like just, cage free and pasture jokes that you can just eat in general as a snack. So sometimes I'm on the go. Those are helpful. but in general, I eat a lot of eggs. So if you have an egg allergy, you know, let us let me know.

I can hopefully give alternatives, but, lots of eggs, lots of, I do sometimes eat sausage and bacon even in the morning. Sometimes I eat more of a paleo diet. Lots of veggies as well. Brussel sprouts a lot of times, and things like that in the morning. lots of, Greek yogurt or A2 sheep's yogurt or something like that. I do a lot of a quick protein powder, smoothies as well, sometimes with the yogurt and frozen fruit. I also have a lot of just, like, grass fed burgers, fish, salmon, cod. It's wild caught.

I'll do a lot of pastured, organic chicken to, tacos, stir fries, soups, a lot of things like that that, can be easily made instapot as a as a good friend as well. So yeah. It was, you know, it's so opposite. Like when I started eating, I was like, this is like, I'm so used to eating not enough for we actually need to be eating more. And it's so opposite. It's kind of like as we get through menopause, we need to be, you know, on the treadmill less. We need to be eating more. It's kind of the opposite of what we've kind of been trained to think, eat nothing and run on the treadmill all day.

Yeah. If you guys have been used to chasing kids around forever, not taking care of yourself, and now it's time to do that, it's going to feel different to really get into that mode of, you know, self-care for you, but really off the treadmill, less, more weights, feeling safe. That's a big thing. But I can't stress that enough for you guys. And then, you know, really looking at where your life, your hard wired and where you need to change things. For example, if you're if you get up and have coffee and then you don't eat all day until the afternoon, I know a lot of people my age that do that.

sometimes it's backwards circadian rhythm. So getting out in the sun first thing in the morning, moving your body so that you develop an appetite, and maybe saving the coffee for when you eat your breakfast, is something that you can do that will be different for you so that you're kind of switching up. Those hormones are released in accordance to the sun. The time of the day, even the movement, your body and the thoughts you're having. So if you guys can kind of get out of that pattern and get out in the sun to regulate your circadian rhythm, this will also help hormonal release to.

So important I did that. I stopped the morning coffee and traded it in for a big mason jar of some protein powder and electrolytes just to start my morning. And then I find some days and like, oh, I don't even desire that coffee because I really hydrated and gave my body that protein and the electrolytes and, you know, then you start looking and I'm a, I'm a I'm a new coffee drinker. Only started drinking coffee three years ago. But I'm like, well, I'm going to go big or go home. So I got like, I, I signed into it.

But you know, you need to start looking at like, I like I'm like, do I even want this? Or is it just like an addiction or you know what, what actually is going on here? So yeah, that morning sun and moving the coffee I that is so important and I personally have experience that anything else you would recommend like just for vagal nerve tone. We talk about like being safe. We're in the parasympathetic system. So what would you speak to on that. Yeah it's easier said than it's easy for me to sit up here and say I regulate the nervous system, right.

It's one of the hardest things that can be done, to be honest with you, because you got to think about how you know, how hard it is to change ourselves and our thought patterns that are sometimes hardwired from birth. And so, you know, oftentimes I'll see someone who's had more of a traumatic childhood, have a harder time regulating their nervous system just because you were taught things were unsafe growing up, even with your immune system. Right. So it's really hard to pull ourselves out of that.

And the nervous system will go towards what's familiar, not even what it wants, but what's let's feel safe. And at least it knows that even if it's not what you want. And so you have to keep that in mind too. So it's a bit of an uphill journey. So don't give up. Even if you feel like you don't do well at first. So really, just being with yourself sometimes, sometimes people like myself, I think, need a silent retreat where I just go for a week and don't talk. And I am with myself. And so many times, you know, when we get home, we check out, we turn on the TV, you know, we start watching endless TV,

Nervous System Regulation and Emotional Healing 26:30

we scroll on our phone endlessly and that's really a distraction from uncomfortable thoughts sometimes, or really working through situation or situations or emotions that maybe have happened that day. And so it's really becoming the observer of your own actions and thoughts. And sometimes that means regulating your breath properly. Most of us hold our breath, and that definitely will elicit more of a pain or fight or flight response within us, without us even kind of knowing it subtly. And we don't even know where it comes from sometimes.

So, you know, many times I think going and doing is a badge of honor in today's society. So and sometimes intuitive thoughts and, and. Advances in business and everything happen in the quiet zone. And people don't know how to be a human being rather than a human doing. And so sometimes that means maybe go get a lymphatic misogyny check out for an hour. If you like pedicures, maybe you go get a pedicure and you don't take your phone. Home. And you just sit there and, you know, be with yourself. maybe that means you take a breath work class where it's really uncomfortable at first, and you want to get up and walk out of the room because the breath is really difficult.

But you work through it and at the end you might be crying. You know, that's the thing is, being with yourself and working through your shadow side and regulating your nervous system. It's not a it's not a it's an inside job. But it's not always pretty, right? Yes, that is true. And it's a lot easier to to take a B vitamin than it is to do some of these really important things you're talking about. I always say that silence speaks loudly, if you will, you will listen, right? And I love what you said. That is so true.

We we have forgot, right? Like, do you have the TV on constantly? Even if you're not watching or, you know, can you get in the car and not turn the radio on and not get on the phone? Or even I just started recently in my sauna because normally when I go in the sauna, I listen to my Kabbalah teacher give like his teaching for the day. But recently I've just been like, you know what? I'm just going to silence. Like I'm not even going to listen to his input. I'm just going to listen to my output. And so I love them, you know, safety and silence.

Right. Like these are these are good prescriptions. These are the important ones and the, the hard ones. Right. It's easy to say. I think maybe that's why a lot of patients come in and they just want to take the vitamins and hope that's going to get them better. Because it's easy to take the vitamin. It's not so easy to really look and observe and walk away and change things up. But this is really this is like this is our time as menopausal women to take our power back into this is our journey. This is our one blip of a life being this being that we're being.

And I think the things you talked about today are like, you know, I say this a lot. Oh my God, this was so important. This is the most important thing. But I really feel like, oh my God, this is like my favorite interview. Sorry everyone else who I interview, but like, you know, just talking about like having safety. Yeah. Such a profound, important thing that we don't you don't go to the doctor and they don't prescribe safety. No. And, you know, whatever that relationship ended, I felt like I was dying, like I was dying.

Like I wasn't going to make it through. Like I was never going to be okay again. Never. And, you know, I had to just lay in bed for a couple days and scream into a pillow and cry and feel sorry for myself and feel like a big, fat victim before I could move through it. And so I think a lot of times we avoid that. I know I did for a little while, but sometimes you just need to, like, go through it and and move through it and really, you know, be honest with yourself. and so many of us stuff our feelings.

We just go, go, go. So because, you know, sometimes if you stop, you might cry. And, and so sometimes we just need to not avoid those feelings. And keeping ourself busy is avoiding. It's avoiding doing the work. It's it's avoiding feeling things that are uncomfortable. And so if that's you guys that get stopped somewhere in your body that also makes your body feel unsafe, it gets stored somewhere. If you don't process these emotions. well, this is an invitation, ladies, to, you know, and just the first step is always even just awareness.

Like, just getting clear on, you know, where do I feel safe? Where don't I feel safe and starting to open up the conversation and listen to this interview again and maybe let it sink in a little more? you know, let yourself cry. you know, like when people cry scene on TV. You see it? I see it in my office. The first thing always is, oh, my God, I'm so sorry. Right? Like apologizing for crying like, no, no no no, bring it, bring it. I'm doing my job. If you're crying, this is a good thing. So it's important to cry and feel our feelings.

Well what a what a what a gift you just gave the audience. Thank you. So, where can they learn more? Where can they? I mean, you're like the Instagram queen. so where can they follow you and hang out with? yeah. So I always tell people there are different hierarchies to hang out with me, if you will. So the first few animation, which is social media, Instagram is probably my biggest platform. So if you guys want to follow me, I give a lot of free information on there. That's the Dr.Jess.MD So Dr.Jess.MD DrJessMD and also on TikTok you can find me on Facebook too.

And then if you guys want more, I have a website with a free how to do "kill, bind, sweat", which is my trademark protocol, and I even answer a lot of different questions that people had written and asked me on there too.

Where to Find Dr. Jess 33:00

So that's drjessmd.com. And then finally, the last hierarchy to hang out with me is wellness class. And we are doing a full overhauling wellness person. Have lots of surprises coming too. But there's a virtual clinic getting ready to launch with me. And then my own Aegis Formula is supplement company too. And while as part of their platform, they teach you how to be your own best doctor. So that's app. app.drjessmd.com. Awesome. So lots of great options. Go follow her. Go hang out with her. She's a wealth of knowledge and a beautiful heart.

The perfect combination with someone to help guide you on your health care journey. So, I love you. I love being here. I love all of you who are here listening and growing and just doing, you know, getting educated and opening up and doing the things because you you too can lose the way you two can have the, the single experience of your dream or call in the relationship of your dreams or the job of your dreams or whatever it is. And so I hope that this gave you some hope and, that it opened your heart as much as it opened mine.

So thank you for being here. I truly, I honor and you know, it just it I'm so grateful that I know there's so many places you can be and that you've chosen to be here with me in the summit to help you grow. So thank you all for being here. Bye everyone.